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Teen Poetry #8

fairy tales

nick_lyss
Member

since 2006-08-21

Posts 88

0 posted 2007-02-04 11:36 AM

   Fairy tales.

  once upon a time there was princess that fell in love with a prince.
   That she danced with in her dreams.Her gleam in her eyes everytime she dreamt  about him is familiar to me.
   Nothing could ever come between them. Until the day he broke her heart

   I used to believe in fairy tales till the day that they were crushed.

  Now I know better that there is no such thing that boy meets girl and fall in love.

  There is no such as fairy tales

buttercupbaby
Member

since 2006-05-03

Posts 400
outside in the rain

1 posted 2007-02-04 12:45 PM

hmm, i like it..it was more like a short short short-story than a poem..If i were you, i'd try to take your basic point of this [there is no such thing as fairy tales] and try to write it into a longer, well-developed poem!
it would be really nice

i think i might do that actually. . .

~missy
My tears of love are a waste of time if I turn away..
my love is a waste of time
if you never stay

whitelielovely
Member

since 2006-12-11

Posts 146
Australia

2 posted 2007-02-05 09:20 AM

i agree with buttercup- that would improve your shorty short story.

Love is never foolish- and if it is, it is a Divine Foolishness.

-Sir Gawain

alda89
New Member

since 2007-02-06

Posts 4

3 posted 2007-02-06 10:18 PM

i wanna make it longer. ill try again to write it alot better.

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