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Open Poetry #44
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Suncleaver
Member
since 2009-01-18
Posts 481
Stafford England

0 posted 2009-05-07 11:34 PM


I am the warmth that nurtures all growing things,
I am the blaze that consumes them,
I am the flicker of rebirth,
I am the sun.

I am the heat within a lover's loins,
I am the fury within a warrior's heart,
I am both the glint of steel and the soft hue of candles,
I am the sun.

I am the firmament of creation,
I am the pyre of death,
I am, for by my light do you know the name of shadow,
I am the sun.


© Copyright 2009 Luke Doubtfire - All Rights Reserved
Robert E. Jordan
Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
1 posted 2009-05-08 12:01 PM


Yo Suncleaver,

This is fairly well done.  Replacing all of those commas after all the complete sentences that make-up your lines would make this grammatically correct.

Bobby

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
2 posted 2009-05-08 01:20 PM


Very nice, dear Luke! You express the dualism of this our Earth level very well.

Enjoyed.

Love,
Margherita


Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
3 posted 2009-05-08 02:15 PM


Terrific self-expose, Apollo!

Shine on!

Linda

A Romantic Heart
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-03
Posts 5496
Forever In Your Heart
4 posted 2009-05-09 08:45 AM


The sun, the moon the stars, love, everything and more....yes you are...and gifted!

~Warm Love

~ARH

Oklahoma Rose
Senior Member
since 2008-02-28
Posts 1586
Oklahoma USA
5 posted 2009-05-09 03:13 PM


Very well written.
sandgrain
Member Elite
since 1999-09-21
Posts 3662
Sycamore, IL, USA
6 posted 2009-05-09 10:03 PM


An enjoyable read.
  God bless,
    Rae

2islander2
Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825
by the sea
7 posted 2009-05-10 02:44 AM


Hello Sun, this is beautifullly expressed and a pure moment of delight..Thanks for the poem.

best wishes

yann

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