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Passions in Poetry

Reflections on Grief - I

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suthern
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since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


0 posted 06-10-2004 11:29 AM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for suthern

No Battle Plan

Grief is a breathing thing

Its soft pant drips drool
On moments that might be happy
The harsh, ragged gasp of it
Makes night something to dread

Its power isn’t a measure of love
But an accounting of the emptiness
That echoes with each beat of heart
When love leaves
And takes hope with it

Though it often introduces
This unwelcome companion
Death isn’t prerequisite
Any great loss allows its flourish

Gnawing on soul’s marrow
It fuels itself by feasting
On the energy and will
Needed to oust it

Thus insuring
Continued existence
Its sense of survival’s strong enough
To destroy that of its host

Tears are but one by-product

I know some have vanquished it
But how do I fill the gaping hole
When what I grieve
Is the me I thought I was

© Copyright 2004 suthern - All Rights Reserved
jellybeans
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since 10-13-2000
Posts 2347


1 posted 06-10-2004 11:42 AM       View Profile for jellybeans   Email jellybeans   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for jellybeans

this is absolutely the best thing you have ever written...or if not best, its up there in your top 3...
the opening verse......wow.......and the follow through......whew...makes me glad my muse is quiet...can't match writing of this quality

oh...and lady...
if you are missing you? just ask me...I got a tight hold on your friendship
Janet Marie
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since 01-22-2000
Posts 18986


2 posted 06-10-2004 11:43 AM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Janet Marie

Its power isn’t a measure of love
But an accounting of the emptiness
That echoes with each beat of heart

=========================

damn.............

*speechless moth*


( and? the moth is giddy..a double post) woo hoo!!  

When your own emptiness is all thats getting through
There comes a point when youre not sure why youre still talking
I passed that point long ago

Jackson Browne
suthern
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on the threshold of a dream


3 posted 06-10-2004 11:53 AM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

jellybeans: You humble me, my friend... I thank you for lending the courage I needed to post it... I do love you so!!! Keep holding on, lady. *S*

JM: You? Speechless??? LOL I'm not sure if that's good or bad... but I'll be presumptious and thank you... blondes understand giddy! *S*
passing shadows
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since 08-26-99
Posts 46297
displaced


4 posted 06-10-2004 12:52 PM       View Profile for passing shadows   Email passing shadows   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for passing shadows

if you don't mind, I'll keep this and part II in my library (though I haven't read part II yet, I know it will be a keeper)
Sunshine
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since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


5 posted 06-10-2004 12:57 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine


Now you know
I'm smiling at the comeback
of this...
Martie
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since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


6 posted 06-10-2004 01:06 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

suthern

"But how do I fill the gaping hole
When what I grieve
Is the me I thought I was"

You fill it with the beauty that is you now!   for this fine poem!

Janet Marie
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since 01-22-2000
Posts 18986


7 posted 06-10-2004 01:10 PM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Janet Marie

any time the moth is quiet tis a very good thing.

even better is when I'm made speechless by such an impressive, poignant write.
Sudhir Iyer
Member Rara Avis
since 04-26-2000
Posts 7206
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium


8 posted 06-10-2004 03:26 PM       View Profile for Sudhir Iyer   Email Sudhir Iyer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sudhir Iyer

a fine write... moving to the part II

regards
sudhir
Enchantress
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since 08-14-2001
Posts 37801
Somewhere in time~


9 posted 06-10-2004 03:47 PM       View Profile for Enchantress   Email Enchantress   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Enchantress

Excellent excellent write!!
Heart hugs~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
Dancing with you in the summer rain~

iliana
Member Patricius
since 12-05-2003
Posts 13488
USA


10 posted 06-10-2004 04:46 PM       View Profile for iliana   Email iliana   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for iliana

Suthern girl -- we're like the growth rings of a tree -- you're still there just another ring is starting.     (great write!)
Ratleader
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since 01-23-2003
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Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass


11 posted 06-10-2004 06:56 PM       View Profile for Ratleader   Email Ratleader   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Ratleader's Home Page   View IP for Ratleader

Laura, this is masterful....this trio of poems has to be one of the best works I've seen in this site.

In the past you've shared with me the feeling that your poetry doesn't compare to that of the quality poets here.... Don't be saying that any more, Suthern gal -- you just proved you are one of them.

I'm putting this on #1 so anybody who starts reading can see what I think. I'm going to put the same words on the others too.

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________
Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 10-28-1999
Posts 5247
state of confusion


12 posted 06-10-2004 07:23 PM       View Profile for Corinne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Corinne

A poignant read, Suthern. To mourn what we once were, why, there's nothing that can bring the old us back, is there?

Wonderful writing. Off to read the other two.


Corinne
garysgirl
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13 posted 06-10-2004 07:38 PM       View Profile for garysgirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit garysgirl's Home Page   View IP for garysgirl

I know some have vanquished it
But how do I fill the gaping hole
When what I grieve
Is the me I thought I was


Oh suthern, this really touched my heart.
Hugs to you, sweet lady  
Ethel

Larry C
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since 09-10-2001
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United States


14 posted 06-10-2004 09:38 PM       View Profile for Larry C   Email Larry C   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Larry C's Home Page   View IP for Larry C

suthern,
You caught me totally unprepared! I wish you peace.

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

Sadelite
Member Elite
since 10-11-2003
Posts 2561


15 posted 06-10-2004 10:00 PM       View Profile for Sadelite   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sadelite

suthern,
  This is an outstanding description of grief.  I hope you get beyond the actual feel of it, as I know it's not a pleasant place to be.  You are a wonderful person/poetess who brightens up many peoples' day.  You have brightened mine a number of times!  Feel better.
   NOW it's off to the races!  I'm betting on NO.#2!  See you there soon.
                Sadelite
Midnitesun
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since 05-18-2001
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Gaia


16 posted 06-10-2004 11:36 PM       View Profile for Midnitesun   Email Midnitesun   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Midnitesun

*keeper*
Marge Tindal
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Florida's Foreverly Shores


17 posted 06-10-2004 11:41 PM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

SweetSuthern~
The depth and the passion of this penning is remarkable~

'Its power isn’t a measure of love
But an accounting of the emptiness
That echoes with each beat of heart
When love leaves
And takes hope with it'


Oh dear lady ... this is superb~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost,
the spirit rejoices over what it has left.
- Sufi epigram <))><

noles1@totcon.com

JamesMichael
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since 11-16-1999
Posts 31622
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA


18 posted 06-11-2004 12:21 AM       View Profile for JamesMichael   Email JamesMichael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for JamesMichael

Enjoyed reading this...James
steavenr
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since 11-17-2003
Posts 4078


19 posted 06-11-2004 12:34 AM       View Profile for steavenr   Email steavenr   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit steavenr's Home Page   View IP for steavenr

WOW!!! what an insightful, excellent write...probably the best I have ever read of your work.  Standing Ovation! Curtain Call! Brava! Brava! Brava!
suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


20 posted 06-11-2004 03:28 PM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

PS: Mind??? *S* Dear lady... I'm immensely honored... thank you so much!!

Sunshine: It told me it wasn't finished... little did I know it meant it so fervently! LOL

Martie: But I'd still come up empty! *G* Thank you so much, kind lady! *S*

JM: You humble me, my friend... I thank you so very, very much. *S*

Sudhir: Thank you so much! *S*

Enchantress: Both hugs and kind words are greatly appreciated... thank you! *S*

iliana: What a great comparison... thank you! *S*

Ratleader: You're one of the finest poets anywhere, my friend... so such praise means the world to me... thank you ever so much!! (even if you are a tattle tale! LOL)

Corinne: No... there isn't... and finding a way to be comfortable with what's left isn't always easy. *S* Thank you!!! *S*

garysgirl: What a lovely heart to touch. *S* Thank you very much! *S*

Larry: To tell the truth, it did me, too. *G* Thank you so much, my friend... I wish the same for you... always. *S*

Sadelite: You are dear... and I thank you so much for your kind comments on both poem and poet! *S*

Midnitesun: Thank you, my friend. *S*

Marge: Oh, dear friend... I thank you so! *S*

JamesMichael: I'm glad... thank you! *S*

steavenr: Your enthusiasm and generosity truly touch my heart... I thank you so much!!

Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 01-23-2003
Posts 7179
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass


21 posted 06-29-2004 01:09 PM       View Profile for Ratleader   Email Ratleader   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Ratleader's Home Page   View IP for Ratleader

Three new arrivals means the first three get a bump!

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

SimplyGold
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since 07-10-2002
Posts 1459


22 posted 06-29-2004 01:26 PM       View Profile for SimplyGold   Email SimplyGold   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SimplyGold

Moved and speechless...
SG
suthern
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since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


23 posted 07-01-2004 05:05 PM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

Ratleader: You honor me, my friend... and I thank you from the depths of my heart. *S*

Simply Gold: Thank you so very much! *S*
GG
Member Elite
since 12-03-2002
Posts 3615
Lost in thought


24 posted 08-27-2004 04:50 PM       View Profile for GG   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for GG

You always learn things about yourself when you grieve...
at least I do.
Wish that did't hurt so much.

Don't know how you can take this and make it so perfect...
but you did!
And thank you.

Always, Alyssa

Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree.
                  Joyce kilmer

 
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