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Open Poetry #42
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Bedside
| Open Poetry #42 |
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Bedside |
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baohan New Member
since 2008-03-01
Posts 5Hochiminh City, Vietnam |
Hi, I'm Baohan and I'm new here. Her voice is quiet You seems sad I’m waiting bedside For today’s death Silence Her lips seems moving But then stopped Your heart stop with her Tears is what you feel Solitary They bring her out You followed You cried I scream, I shout Why does god have to take her away? Her bedside Accompanied by you and me With silence and solitary She dies… At least with someone bedside Not alone Not in the dark Still bedside Quiet. My first post here. Everyday of my life, I see them passing me by. |
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| © Copyright 2008 Bao Han Tran Le - All Rights Reserved | |||
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effjayel Senior Member
since 2007-09-30
Posts 1474At the Crossroads of Infinity |
Bao Han, welcome & I hope you enjoy your time here...good first effort..It is a little stilted in the flow but I can sense that is because english is not your first language? No critcism aimed at you here, merely an observation...it is like riding a bicycle, the more you practice, the better you will get...stick around, looking forward to your journey. John |
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LadyTom Member
since 2008-02-29
Posts 353LA, CA |
A very warm welcome to this wonderful land and big family.  Beautiful poem. sad and sigh. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Baohan, Welcome to PiP Talk! I enjoyed your first post, and would like to see more of your writing in the near future. Please check your Email for a Very Special Greeting! " It matters not this distance now " Excerpt, Yesterday's Love |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
At least with someone bedside Not alone Not in the dark Still bedside Quiet. Oh, dear Baohan, you moved me to tears with this sad, sensitive poem and especially with the above lines, as they brought forth very very painful memories. Welcome to Pip! love Margherita |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
Such a powerful write. I know about that bedside moment. Welcome to Passions! |
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secondhanddreampoet Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394a 'Universalist' ! |
EXCELLENT 'first post!' A VERY warm welcome to "P.I.P.-land!" very serious and long-sustained applause for this 'write!!' |
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Roniece Dawson-Bruce Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689Sydney, Australia |
and a big welcome to you from down under to our pages blue... I look forward to reading more of your work.. RDB Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight......... |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
WELCOME TO PIP! ARCTIC WIND |
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ArtSolstice Member
since 2007-03-18
Posts 498 |
Greetings baohan and welcome to Passions in Poetry! Thank you for posting your very moving poem. I also like the quote at the bottom of it. We look forward to reading more of your work here. |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
touching first post Welcome to PIP and I hope to read more of you |
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Alison
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
Bao Han, Welcome to PiP. What a beautiful and sad poem. I look forward to reading more of your poetry. Alison |
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