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Kira Aso
Member

since 2006-09-26

Posts 351
Closer to Hell...

0 posted 2006-10-13 02:49 PM

I’m falling down
Into to a sea full of fire
Dripping in flames
and cursed names
I forever hold my peace
Confusion in it’s intensity
engulfs me in it’s fire like a prison
Locked away, no ones looking
Forced to stay, my brains are cooking
It makes no sense when it should
The pain it stacks like stacks of wood
More fuel for the fire that will soon ignite
More fuel for the rage that will soon brake into a fight
Tears of fury, fits of rage, locked away inside a cage
Makes no sense when it should
The Devil smiles “This should be good”
Trying to walk away with my dignity in tacked
But it’s lost for good and that’s a fact
I’m falling down
And very soon I’m going to drown
Into a sea of fire

Kira Aso
Member

since 2006-09-26

Posts 351
Closer to Hell...

1 posted 2006-10-13 02:55 PM

I'm not sure I'm going to be submitting any more poetry for a while.

(Insperation rarely strikes me)

I'm coming to find more and more that I enjoy reading poetry more then writing it. And I love seeing other peoples work!
I'm not great at expressing myself so it makes writing poems really hard. lol

Thanx all!

RevengeIsMine
Senior Member

since 2006-07-08

Posts 820
Australia

2 posted 2006-10-13 08:29 PM

Kira, i really enjoy reading your work. I also only get an insperation to write every now and then, sumtimes i can be sitting on a bus and i just need to write and then other times i cant write at all. Hope to see you writing again soon.

Hugs and Lotsa Luv,
Jessica

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

3 posted 2006-10-13 10:54 PM

you do a great job! Keep writing!

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

4 posted 2006-10-13 10:59 PM

Hope to read more of your strong verse Kira...maybe not easy to find the words...but the heart tells itself well to the page.
TD

miscellanea
Member Elite

since 2004-06-24

Posts 4060
OH

5 posted 2006-10-14 12:40 PM

Kira Aso,

I really enjoyed how you formatted this! It strengthened the movement and feeling you already had in your poem, giving it lots of power. YOu very well controlled my mood and speed of reading. Nicely done!

miscellanea

Kira Aso
Member

since 2006-09-26

Posts 351
Closer to Hell...

6 posted 2006-10-14 09:24 AM

Thanx all!

I'm happy you liked! As much as I like this poem though it feels like something is lacking in it...I dunno it just does. (Maybe I'm too critical)

Thankyou all again!

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