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Open Poetry #46
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3 haiku
| Open Poetry #46 |
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3 haiku |
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Bastet Member
since 2010-05-07
Posts 246 |
spring paints our pleasure loud raspberry, regal purple, bubble gum pink, pop art all in one reckless flash defies our winter vision writing a series of mechanical haiku dry as equations no pyrotechnics dazzle my darkling inspiration dream of hot pursuit fading on the morning light a flock of ravens cawing on the balcony at a middle-aged scarecrow |
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| © Copyright 2010 Bastet - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Eusta B. Mae Senior Member
since 2010-05-03
Posts 903 |
Way cool! I'm liking it alot! Wecome to the Pip place! ebm |
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whisperingwalt Member
since 2010-04-29
Posts 240Coquitlam, BC, Canada |
Welcome..like the style..creative..good job.WW |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
B...although not Haiku by definition, the series of suggestions fit the vibe of a Haiku and Senryu blending..enjoyed the view. welcome to the bluezone |
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threadbear Senior Member
since 2008-07-10
Posts 817Indy |
Hi, Bastet and just wanted to compliment you on the splendid writing. Be aware, however, that haiku is 3 lines: 5 syllables, 7 syllables, 5 syllables. Still, your 5 line poems show considerable talent! Jeff |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Gorgeous, crystal clarity! Lovely work, as for the structure, I suppose it has it's place, if you really want to go there. Welcome welcome!!! I look forward to reading your poetry. |
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srizah Junior Member
since 2010-05-03
Posts 34India |
cool cool cool Live Life! |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Welcome to Passions! Please, check your email for a Very Special Welcome!! " It matters not this distance now " Excerpt, Yesterday's Love |
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Bastet Member
since 2010-05-07
Posts 246 |
Yes, I agree with all the above comments. Your poems are a delight to read. In this one you paint pictures with words. I can see the whole scene with the weather changing. Thank you, Sunshine. It's a great way to start the day. |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
Very nice! Welcome to Pip! Love, Margherita |
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Amaryllis Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306Mi now |
I love this, Bastet- am I wrong in assuming you were writing `about` Haiku, not intentionally `in` the form? That is the way it strikes me.. how Spring`s abundant profusion cannot be corraled into such a tight form.. sublime, as always.  |
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Bastet Member
since 2010-05-07
Posts 246 |
Thank you Amaryllis. You are quite right. It is not haiku but tanka (5-7-5-7-7). Glad you liked it. |
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