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Open Poetry #31
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Ryan
Member
since 1999-06-10
Posts 297
Kansas

0 posted 2004-01-30 06:49 PM


A Back Road Home

The highway is nothing
more than a back road,
hidden on maps like a
capillary that slowly guides
travelers from one part
of nowhere to the next.

One day, spring always
seems to be the best time,
ignore the call of the interstate
and go searching for this road.
Tucked away in the aging hills
(which once were covered by
the waves they so resemble),
it will appear suddenly, like
an Appalachian mountain
road's younger cousin.

Once you have started down
the road, don't be worried as
a cloud of dust obscures
everything behind you.
That is the way of things.

Soon, you'll come to a town,
one that is now reserved for
memories and colorless photos.
Take the proper series of turns
(they can be gotten from an
old man sitting on a porch, who
has been waiting for just this
moment) and you'll find a
graveyard, sitting atop
one more hill, its stone
engravements old and weathered.
Stop for a while and notice:
the birds still singing,
the gravestones still telling
their tales,
the Grand Army of the Republic
still marching.

Far in the distance,
herds of cars move
down
the
interstate
much
too
fast
to understand this moment.


in heaven,
everything is fine

© Copyright 2004 Ryan Williams - All Rights Reserved
Amara
Member
since 2003-02-23
Posts 158
East of the moon, west of the sun.
1 posted 2004-01-30 07:40 PM


Wow.

Now here's a gem. Why hasn't anyone read this yet? Why? They're missing out. This remind sme so much of a poem I wrote once...'Along the Easy Road'...the same writing style, and underlying themes.

"...that slowly guides
travelers from one part
of nowhere to the next." (I like that a lot. It was the first hook.)

"(they can be gotten from an
old man sitting on a porch, who
has been waiting for just this
moment)" (It's so...cute's not the word, but...it's a beautiful touch, it adds something...an image in your mind, and a feeling...)

"Far in the distance,
herds of cars move
down
the
interstate
much
too
fast
to understand this moment." (I like the line breaks here. Good call. And thumbs up on for the last line- I hold that the last line has to be amazing, or the poem's not as good. You definately get top scores here.)

Overall, wonderful pictures in your mind, very serene..I honestly like it- and I do not lie here, nor exaggerate, so take that as sincere!

Light keep you always,
Amara

To see something as an end is to mourn for it; to see it as a beginning is to have hope.

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
2 posted 2004-01-30 07:43 PM


enjoyed this
EverRuss
Member
since 2003-12-31
Posts 66
Indiana
3 posted 2004-01-30 08:09 PM


This is one of the best piece of writings i have seen on here( i say this through my own opinion). I think this poem is wonderful. You get a full 10 out of 10 from me

If my poems could talk they would mean more than the words

Russell

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
4 posted 2004-01-30 08:19 PM


Ryan, this is a beautiful poem. I really enjoyed reading it. When going on a trip, I had much rather have the time to go the regular highways instead of the interstate. this part of your poem really stood out.......

Soon, you'll come to a town,
one that is now reserved for
memories and colorless photos.
Take the proper series of turns
(they can be gotten from an
old man sitting on a porch, who
has been waiting for just this
moment) and you'll find a
graveyard, sitting atop
one more hill, its stone
engravements old and weathered.
Stop for a while and notice:
the birds still singing,
the gravestones still telling
their tales,
the Grand Army of the Republic
still marching.


Just beautiful writing.
Hugs  
Ethel


Grover
Senior Member
since 2004-01-27
Posts 1967
London, ON, Canada
5 posted 2004-01-30 08:38 PM


A great read! Grover.
A Romantic Heart
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-03
Posts 5496
Forever In Your Heart
6 posted 2004-01-31 03:04 AM


Precise, smooth and I like the way you told a story, but also putting words of wisdom inside as well...

another Robert Frost!

~ARH
love and hugs

Open your eyes, open your mind, open your heart, let me come in and show you love.....~ARH

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
7 posted 2004-01-31 04:51 AM


OMG! Thanks for this! This is awesome! KEEPER!
dingusjr
Member
since 2003-09-24
Posts 415
Missouri
8 posted 2004-02-01 04:52 PM


YES.....I enjoyed this also.  Good read!
Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
9 posted 2004-02-01 05:15 PM




(big angel hugs) This had a big "Zen And The Art Of Motorcycle Maintenance" feel to it, sweet friend, I too believe the least paved roads are the best, unfortunately too many usurp time to allow us to travel our own imaginary U.S 66 or U.S 777! (sigh) God Bless You, sweet friend, this is very heartfelt, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Ryan, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"You'll find something that's enough to keep you
But if the bright lights don't receive you
You should turn yourself around and come back home" MB20

Gemini
Senior Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 1203
Wisconsin, USA
10 posted 2004-02-01 06:00 PM


Lovely read with thought provoking imagery, very nicely done.
Kie
Member
since 2004-02-01
Posts 77
USA
11 posted 2004-02-02 04:07 PM


This was a privilege to read. Well constructed, each line, word, stanza was perfection-a perfect flow.
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