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Teen Poetry #6
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Hallucination
Member
since 2001-03-18
Posts 419


0 posted 2002-11-19 01:42 AM


"The Lonely One"
(19/11/02)
© 2002 Brian Eggertsen, All Rights Reserved

Verse 1
Sitting on the corner every morning
Singing songs with his guitar,
You can tell by his tears the stories true
He sings them with a scared heart.
While endless struggles dance upon his face
Like shadows in the morning sun,
From people passing him by on the street
He's known as the lonely one....

Verse 2
I watch him from my window every morn'
Counting pennies from his hat,
I wonder where it all went wrong for him
Why he's forced to live by rats.
Why between old trashcans he pulls his strings
Singing 'bout losing each run,
With closing curtains and bottles of blues
He's known as the lonely one...

Bridge 1
One day the lonely one was gone,
He died of heart problems they said.
But his message do still read strong,
It's something I will never forget.
He's used to sing....

Verse 3
You're too judgmental, 'bout the suits we wear,
Put those judging eyes to rest.
Sit down, think about, everything 'cause it's,
No popularety test.
So what, if I am, caught in lifes gutter,
At least I still carry a smile.
So what, if you have. all money can buy.
It'll only last awhile...

Bridge 2
All we really are is inside,
The outside's just a carmuflage.
Don't matter where we sleep at night,
A rich man's bed or in the trash.
He used to sing....
And a man couldn't be more right.
'Bout everything....
The lonely one....

© Copyright 2002 Brian Eggertsen - All Rights Reserved
vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
1 posted 2002-11-21 01:22 AM



Brian~
I really like this one.
You are definately growing in your writing,
and I'm enjoying reading your work.
I love the feel of this one and the overall message
is a very powerful one.
Keep up the good work.
~Vicky

"...until you have read the verse on his heart,
you have not truly met the poet.
~vlraynes

Riley
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038
in the pouring rain
2 posted 2002-11-21 08:00 AM


Wow, I was hit hard by the message. Took me off guard, how extremely well penned it was, and how quickly it got to me. Whoa. Ok, well back to this. I agree, you have grown quite a lot from when you first started ( then again haven't we all )

Anywho, Good job.


Riley

~*I found how to laugh, forgot how to smile, somehow your words, make it all worthwhile*~

Spine Grinder
Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127
Standing In Silence...
3 posted 2002-11-21 08:48 PM


What You Can't Have- You Can't Resist

Ina
Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada
4 posted 2002-11-21 09:29 PM


Brian, this was very nicely written. i liked the concept. keep writing

regina

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