In the wake
of my many past disasters--
some further behind than others--
I have always overpowered
the intense urge to succumb.
After all,
I'm the headstrong girl
who must always be in control.
I give too often
and refuse to take,
putting others into a debt
that they can't repay.

As fiercely
(and sometimes wrongly)
independent as I force myself to be,
I know I can't
spend this life alone.
Behind angry shields
and violent impulses,
scattered amidts
my angst-ridden thoughts
are needs that I cannot deny.

All these years of being
stubborn and strong,
then you force me to give in
with your tenderness.
Your moist, trembling lips
open after a kiss
haunt me when I'm alone.
I drown in your mahogany eyes
as you teach me
it's not a fault to succumb.

You are everything I am
and everything I want to be.

Mikhail, my love,
my ache,
my obsession;
I have know since a child
that I would marry you.
You make me forget
why I hate myself
You make me content
and complete my soul.

Mikhail, my love,
my ache,
my obsession;
I do.
My love.

You are my forever.