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Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

0 posted 2003-02-19 04:31 PM

Her memory still walks
the river with me
In half topped hunt for leaves
And rolled short wading
That always left more wet than dry
In quest for bank grown wild

I remember how
As she,
Clothes in pile on bank
Would swim the pools below
The riffled white I fished
Disappearing in a flash of flesh
Beneath the cool
Building heat in me
That we quenched
On rush lined banks

Many years have passed
And though the river changed
I still feel the way
With press of hand and lip
She teased me into
Smiling sunlight

I see her now…
In every reflected sparkle
On the waves
And look for her
Round every bend
Though I know
she is gone

[This message has been edited by Cpat Hair (02-19-2003 04:35 PM).]

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

1 posted 2003-02-19 04:37 PM

Beautiful..but told with such an ache.
Found myself holding my breath again as I read you.
This should really be a book submission you know?!

~Hugs & Smiles, Nancy~

~ Trace my body with your words..
And in doing so, you touch my heart. ~

INclan
Senior Member

since 1999-07-20

Posts 1024
Indiana, USA

2 posted 2003-02-19 04:37 PM

Well done. I find your timing very interesting since the frost line is down a full 2 feet outside. I enjoyed the tone of your creation both sad and yet sweet. It feels to me like you are writing from a personal experience.

INclan

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

3 posted 2003-02-19 04:38 PM

Many years have passed
And though the river changed
I still feel the way
With press of hand and lip
She teased me into
Smiling sunlight

I see her now…
In every reflected sparkle
On the waves
And look for her
Round every bend
Though I know
That she is gone
===========================

the one that got away?
we all have that one muse that pulls the memories and ache back up from the deeper wells. You write what we feel but dont have the words to define...the universal heartache...but in your unique style.

scorpio
Member Ascendant

since 2002-10-02

Posts 5178
right...there

4 posted 2003-02-19 04:43 PM

A lost love leaves a scar....the cut heals..the pain remains...your words made me check my scar..another wonderful write, Ron..

believe in what your heart feels...

regards2you
Member Elite

since 2002-10-01

Posts 3940
California

5 posted 2003-02-19 04:44 PM

Oh my....so wonderful...perfect descriptions of the water and love and heartbreaking finale....it amazes me how one poem can hold so much and many kinds of emotional impact.

Enjoyed greatly, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
"Desiderata"

Sunkissed
Senior Member

since 2002-12-03

Posts 610

6 posted 2003-02-19 04:47 PM

Beautiful poem, Captain, the title fits perfectly.

Is it as JM put it? "the one that got away..."

I suppose we'll never know.

Sunkissed.

[This message has been edited by Sunkissed (02-19-2003 04:48 PM).]

vandana

Member Patricius

since 1999-10-22

Posts 10463
USA

7 posted 2003-02-19 04:50 PM

enjoyed

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

8 posted 2003-02-19 04:51 PM

His memory still walks
the river with me
In half topped hunt for leaves
And rolled short wading
That always left more wet than dry
In quest for bank grown wild

I remember how
As he,
Clothes in pile on bank
Would swim the pools below
The riffled white I fished
Disappearing in a flash of flesh
Beneath the cool
Building heat in me
That we quenched
On rush lined banks

Many years have passed
And though the river changed
I still feel the way
With press of hand and lip
he teased me into
Smiling sunlight

I see him now…
In every reflected sparkle
On the waves
And look for him
Round every bend
Though I know
he is gone

~*~

Yep, just what I thought....
works both ways...

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

9 posted 2003-02-19 05:04 PM

thanks folks..one and all for the read and the comments... they are appreciated greatly.

this was just written to express a feeling...never knew anyone to walk the river with this way and the experience...all imagination... so the one that got away? nah..the one that never was....

thanks again...

Duncan
Member Ascendant

since 2001-08-07

Posts 5455

10 posted 2003-02-19 11:22 PM

'Many years have passed
And though the river changed
I still feel the way
With press of hand and lip
She teased me into
Smiling sunlight'

Damn, your explanation blew my response. That'll teach ya to explain your poetry...

It was gonna be GOOD!

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

11 posted 2003-02-20 12:01 PM

Very much enjoyed.

"Love makes the world go around"
~with love and hugs from Ethel GG~

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

12 posted 2003-02-20 03:55 AM

definately one I can relate to

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

13 posted 2003-02-21 12:17 PM

I'm glad I didn't let this one get away... *S* Excellent work, Cap'n!

Ratleader

Member Rara Avis

since 2003-01-23

Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

14 posted 2003-02-21 12:21 PM

You Are The Man! A nice read!

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