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Blood Wall
| Open Poetry #15 |
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Blood Wall |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Gather blades of war, Cling to oaths that we have swore, Join and make dying, The debts must be paid once more, Those home are crying. Misty air dew fields, With rising sun slowly yields, Corn sentries soft sways, Fully risen nothing shields, From the warmth of summer days. Forest home behind, Only on trail not his mind, Barren lands coming, Friends and enemies to find, The sounds of war comes drumming. Walls of bloody stone, Made with the mountain’s own bone, Mounting for waiting, Traveled so far from his home The hoards of evil massing. Forest home autumn, Colored leaves and yet none comes, Fields yield no waiting, Yet there ends the sounds of drums, Blood stone abating, Return from dying, As winter wind come flying, Oaths filled and made, With tears joy and pain crying, Return to hearth blades. Gloom |
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| © Copyright 2001 Aszard Drazlom - All Rights Reserved | |||
Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
interesting read ... nice word play.... I enjoyed |
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Alicat Member Elite
since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094Coastal Texas |
Prof, I must say that I really enjoy the structural mechanics you employ in your writings. And this one is no exception. Your allusions and references brought to mind many polar aspects, predominatly War and Peace. The War aspect reminded me of the Great War (WWI), with the Battle of Verdun, the ravaging of the French countryside, sojourners granting surcease and cease of living, with none left to plow those bloodied fields, holding instead to their fragile Alliance System. On the flip side was the Peace aspect, or natural aspect. It has been said that men wage war in times of plenty, for in times of famine, people are too busy trying to find food. In this way, I saw the changing of seasons, the rolling armies of Time marching over the fields and woods, of the harvest, the time of reaping with no time left to wander the blazing leafed wood. You know...for some odd reason, I could hear the voice of Churchill reading this one in my mind... |
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Lady In White
since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799USA |
What Ali said.... could be repeated here. This was a marvelous read, much more to it than mere lines... I heard the drumming... saw the warriors... felt the blood trickle and chill. Well done Sir! |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Thank you, Cpat Hair, I am glad you enjoyed. Thank you, Alicat, I am please you like the mechanics, Since it’s what I think I do best in poetry; Lacking the full range of emotion that other possess. I wanted to give a cycle effect, but the attackers were More like the Huns in my mind, Sweeping across the south of Europe, Although any war is much the same. Churchill would be a good reader. Thank you, Lady in White, You honor me with so high of praise As to be able to associate so much to my mere words. Gloom |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Well what can I add to this except I truly enjoyed reading you at your craft, and you do it so well! ~ Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance ~And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance ~ I hope you dance. (Lee Ann Womack) |
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