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Teen Poetry #5
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punkrockerrobin
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0 posted 2001-10-22 09:32 AM


if love was just a word we said to show we care, then there wouldn't be so much hate for the word when couples used it.

if love was just a word then why do i hate it somuch? why do i shiver at the sound of it?
some do say it's only a word, but to me and others it is much more than a word.

so i guess for now love is only a word. But i will warn you use it catiously! if you don't the consequences are unbareable!

i'm just dumb!! i can't do nuthin right!

© Copyright 2001 Robin Hill - All Rights Reserved
Skyfire
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1 posted 2001-10-22 07:02 PM


Okay, well, I liked the message behind it, but I didn't really like the format and flow. To me, it was a little hard to follow. If you worked on it, then you might be able to get the flow going a little bit better. Don't get me wrong; I really like the message! You don't have to work on it if you don't want, it's your poem, I was just suggesting a little bit!     

If you define cowardice as running away, tripping and screaming at the first sign of danger, then yes, Mister Brave Man, I guess I am a coward.

Jenn Cirrincione
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2 posted 2001-10-23 09:29 AM


I also liked the point of the poem. Love is more than a word NO DOUBT.... it's used so many ways nowadays... for friends, for foods we like...etc... but true love... that's different...looking into someones eyes, looking into their heart and saying that you love them. It's so much different.

Jenn

"I want love on my own terms; after everything I've ever learned. Me, I carry too much baggage..."

punkrockerrobin
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3 posted 2001-10-23 12:22 PM


so true jen! i been told that word and yet i end up in so much pain. so now when i say it it just means i care.
~*~ROBIN~*~

i'm just dumb!! i can't do nuthin right!

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