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Open Poetry #14
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Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793


0 posted 2001-06-13 08:47 AM



Eloquence
Darting minnow fashion
Away from me,
Struggles in current
Of mid-mind stream lines
Past eddies of yesterday,
Finding no refuge
Under ponderous words,
Or in lee of drift word snags,
Collected on points
Of sand shifted bendings.
Until…
Disappearing into depths
Seemingly transparent,
Only the glittered ripples
Of surface reflections
Dance on minds eye,
Distracting again
Predacious efforts
To see where
It hides.

© Copyright 2001 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved
Decaflame
Senior Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 1635

1 posted 2001-06-13 09:16 AM


The imagery in this is sparkling....and the water felt so cool as I waded in, searching for the elusive....
thecraig
Member
since 2001-03-11
Posts 223

2 posted 2001-06-14 03:04 AM


Parallel's with memory seasrching & a darting fish magnificent.

Mysteria
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Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
3 posted 2001-06-14 04:52 AM


Oh but can you play images!  Do I ever have an email stationery to go with this, too bad I can't send it to you!  Beautiful, thank you for such a nice piece before bedtime.

[This message has been edited by Mysteria (edited 06-14-2001).]

Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
4 posted 2001-06-14 06:34 AM


You have such a wonderful flow to these words Cpat Hair ... beautiful imagery and phrasing, very nicely done.  

Best wishes,
/Kit

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
5 posted 2001-06-14 06:36 AM


Beautiful word pictures and a work well done!

The role of poetry is to utter the un-utterable; to open up
spaces of consciousness and resistance; to language oppressions; to
re-language historie

Death
Member
since 2001-05-26
Posts 112
Twilight
6 posted 2001-06-14 07:20 AM


Your lines do indeed
reinforce images liquid
flowing fluid and free

SEA
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Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
7 posted 2001-06-14 09:35 AM


this is wonderful  
VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
8 posted 2001-06-14 09:54 AM


I can not add, only echo!
Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

9 posted 2001-06-14 11:19 AM


Thanks to everyone for commenting!!!

I used to spend quite a lot of time on or near rivers and streams....the images and the peaceful feelings they have often show up in what I write..

Thanks AGain!!!!

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