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Open Poetry #13
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Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware

0 posted 2001-04-03 03:16 PM


(with some obvioous inspiration from Sunshine - -I've not done any cinquains for a while - My thanks to her for reawakening my interest)

Cannot be ignored
Emotions spoken with eyes
Love beyond all doubt


As long as there’s breath
Engraved within both our hearts
Memories transcend time


Though cold winds shall blow
Shared warmth shall be our furnace
Ours alone to know


On shores, lofty trails
Our eyes clasp, as well as hands
Knowledge borne of time


Borne on ether’s winds
Lips brand mutual ownership
Given, accepted




The first duty of love is to listen.

               ~ Paul Tillich ~

[This message has been edited by Wilfred Yeats (edited 04-03-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Wilfred Yeats - All Rights Reserved
Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
1 posted 2001-04-03 03:47 PM


Lovely work. Cinquains are my son's favorite kind of poetry to write - I'll have to show him these!

Corinne

Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

2 posted 2001-04-03 04:16 PM


I only recently found this form and you did a great job with it!!
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
3 posted 2001-04-03 04:21 PM


Well, I am glad to know that I inspire others....

a wonderful read, Mr. Yeats! Thank you for this lovely gift!

Panne447
Member
since 2001-04-03
Posts 196
S.A. TX
4 posted 2001-04-03 04:36 PM


Wil, This is a great piece or series of Senyrus but these are not cinquains. For one thing, each cinquain- whether formal or informal - is made up of 5 lines.
A formal cinquain should be only 2 syllables on line 1, 4 on line 2, 6 on 3, 8 on 4 and back to 2 on line 5: informal cinquains are
1 word on line 1, 2 words on line 2, 3 word on 3. 4 words on 4 and end with i word on line 5. Hope that helps. Tho, you might have just typo'd - But they are terrific Senyru. Thaks for sharing them. Panne

Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware
5 posted 2001-04-03 10:06 PM


Corinne, Kathleen, Sunshine -
Please see my reply below to Panne447

Panne447=
You're talking to someone wjho knows better -
I really cannot tell you where my mind was when I titled this -
as you can see I've corrected it =
cinquain: 2,4,6,8,2
haiku, senyru: 5,7,5

What can I say but thanks (blush)

Paula Finn
Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546
missouri
6 posted 2001-04-03 11:09 PM


This is lovely...I have come to love senryus..so much said in so few words...its a gift

"If you are going to walk on thin ice, you might as well dance!"
-Anonymous

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