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Dark Poetry #3
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"beyond"
| Dark Poetry #3 |
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"beyond" |
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coyote Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 1077 |
"beyond" I loved you beyond reason for there are no excuses to free those wagging tongues of appellate gossip would in the breach of silence break the mainsail on this ship of fools such blindness does no service to frigidity's complaint I loved you beyond passion for there is no illusion astride this morbid rock you were shipwrecked upon a tide of ecstasy swelled from eons of fear let the tempest rage until such needs subside I loved you beyond bliss for there is no ignorance beneath your royal robes hides an alabaster icon whose countenance diminishes nothing save the wages of sin your sails are full my lady and our course is true I loved you beyond truth ask not for deception "The greatest of all faults is to be conscious of none." |
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| © Copyright 2003 coyote - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Dedreia Member
since 2000-07-10
Posts 172Kokomo, Indiana, United States |
WOW!!!! I like this very much. I will look for more of your work. Dee "It doesn't matter who you love, or how you love, but that you love" Rod McKuen |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
It's a coyote! Just saying hi, touching base...how you doing? Interesting piece of poetry you have here, I have a personal thing against extended metaphors so can't say I've enjoyed it as muh as earlier pieces from you...there - no gutshooting here   K |
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coyote Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 1077 |
Thanks Dee. I appreciate your reading. Though I must admit to a lack of productivity lately. Hi Kamla. Methinks I may have watched "Shakespeare in Love" too many times. Isn't a metaphor meant to extend? Figuratively speaking, of course.  coyote "The greatest of all faults is to be conscious of none." |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
course not... Here's a poor set of off-the-top examples Example A: the river snaked through the grass. One metaphor, one line, one image.. Example B: A poem about a river snaking: Begins with image of a river next image - subject watches that river next image - subject compares another person to a snake next image - subject compares the love he\she has for that person to the river flowing - ie, it's endless, goes to the sea blah blah blah and on and on one extended metaphor poem yuck K[This message has been edited by Severn (02-13-2003 01:37 AM).] |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Oh stuff it - I'll embarrass meself heh... /pip/Forum12/HTML/001343.html there you go - one ghastly extended metaphor from moi, back in the days when I thought I could write hehehe K |
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coyote Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 1077 |
Thanks for the insight,K. However, I liked your "Illness" poem. Most of the metaphors I use are essentially religious in nature. Just me browbeating my readers again, I guess? And for me they are all quite "extended": I meant the stormy sailing metaphor to conjure up dark voyages like Columbus' expedition to the New World. I meant the sexual metaphors to refer to love as the same kind of journey. I meant the recurring refereces to various "conditions of being in love" to conjure up sympathetic scenario/memories in the reader's mind. But primarily it is about "losing my religion", which can be a journey of ultimate fear, for beneath all faith there is love. P.S. I wrote this in 5 minutes too. I know. It shows. Thanks, coyote "The greatest of all faults is to be conscious of none." |
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