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Open Poetry #12
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

0 posted 2001-02-14 06:23 PM


What Lies Within

Hidden amongst the slender ink pen's well
are dreams and poems, stories to tell
in the grace of this, the written hand
my fears and insecurities lose command

there is no more a fervent desire
than to cause a fiery, tempestuous fire
O do I so want the passion to feel
that for you, every written word is real

to place my hand atop your chest
and let your heart feel my caress
to touch, to move, your soul, your mind
to share this pathos with all mankind

this fervent desire, this growing glow
is the impetus that drives me so,
O I could write of other things,
but nothing more stirring will then bring

a shy smile to these, my lips, then my face,
that to think these, my words, you embrace,
and if your heart I could ever touch
that's all I would ask, it means so much..



Karilea
If I whisper, will you listen?...
I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound.
KRJ







[This message has been edited by Sunshine (edited 02-14-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved
Rex Allen McCoy
Member Elite
since 2000-01-30
Posts 2863
Sippin a Timmy's in London
1 posted 2001-02-14 06:37 PM


very nicly done Karilea
it shows good use of language, woven into a nice flow
It doesen't lean on cliche for help either

I like it

Rex

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

2 posted 2001-02-14 06:39 PM


to place my hand atop your chest
and let your heart feel my caress
to touch, to move, your soul, your mind
to share this pathos with all mankind

this fervent desire, this growing glow
is the impetus that drives me so,
O I could write of other things,
but nothing more stirring will then bring

a shy smile to these, my lips, then my face,
that to think these, my words, you embrace,
and if your heart I could ever touch
that's all I would ask, it means so much..

=====================

oh my...look at this cadence kissed gift I just found ....
(and to quote a wise sun)
I love this...and oh yes..this loves me...
and now its going to follow me home...
to be kept in a safe place...wrapped in finest lace

When you see thru loves illusion, theres the danger
your perfect lover looks like a perfect fool
you go running off in search of a perfect stranger

Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
3 posted 2001-02-14 06:45 PM


And I shall embrace this one with much tenderness. Truely a lovely write and as JM pointed out, the cadence is superb to say the least. I do believe that this is the dream of all poets and writers alike and you have penned it beautifully.
Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
4 posted 2001-02-14 08:14 PM


As soft and delicate as a spring tulip!

Corinne

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
5 posted 2001-02-14 10:35 PM


thank you all....it seemed to befit the day.....
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
6 posted 2001-02-14 11:32 PM


befits the day perfectly...a world of passion can be contained in one little inkwell...in the right hands
Poeminister
Senior Member
since 2000-02-26
Posts 1862
Regina SK; Canada
7 posted 2001-02-15 01:23 AM


Sunshine, this flows like silk. Beautifully penned.

Poeminister

"At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet."
-Plato

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
8 posted 2001-02-15 08:38 AM


'Deer, Poeminister...thank you so much for reading....
encre du coeur
Junior Member
since 2000-12-24
Posts 15
Florida
9 posted 2001-02-15 08:57 AM


Beautifully said.
Marsha
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423
Maidstone Kent England
10 posted 2001-02-15 09:24 AM


Kari dear heart, sometimes even though I know how wonderful your writing always is, you leave me with nothing to say except

STUNNING

and it is love truly fabulous work. As it always is



Take care love as always
Puck
  




Take back the hope you gave,- I claim
Only a memory of the same
Robert Browning






[This message has been edited by Marsha (edited 02-15-2001).]

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
11 posted 2001-02-15 12:44 PM


Beautifully written! It flowed straight into my heart. *S*
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