navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #12 » the imaginary fall
Open Poetry #12
Post A Reply Post New Topic the imaginary fall Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855


0 posted 2001-02-11 05:00 PM


This one needs a little explanation. My friend has this idea for a story about the rise and fall of an imaginary band. Since the story is a guaranteed tragedy -- it ends with the lead singer committing suicide due to guilt -- I decided to fashion the poem the same way, only without the crutch of emotion and justification to make the suicide seem less than it really is. Onward.

the imaginary fall
inspired by a story by Lori-Anne Hager

The colored air gripped smoke and sense.
Acid spiders crawled like birthday dreams.
She cried like a child, but never a woman.
Champagne ice in buckets at her feet.

Diamond girl waves a white flag,
a gun that entices like jewelry light.
A mistaken, foolish sleep tight.
Bang. Goodnight.

She sang something months before
she laid herself to sleep on the floor;
the following closed door:

“Without you I couldn’t fly.
I remained stranded on the ground.
So I taught the spiders to cry.
In their webs I will stay bound.”




[This message has been edited by bsquirrel (edited 02-11-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 MPC - All Rights Reserved
Celeste
Senior Member
since 2000-11-11
Posts 597

1 posted 2001-02-11 05:49 PM


REALLY REALLY love the way you've worded this!   Am saving so I can contemplate it some more.  Thank you for sharing it!

To capture and live a moment is truly living


bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

2 posted 2001-02-11 05:55 PM


Thanks, dreamkeeper!  
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

3 posted 2001-02-12 12:18 PM


Hey you...and yes...good stuff! Surreal, but isn't life, really? pronounced moreso by death...tell "l" I would be honored to read her work too. HUGS.
bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

4 posted 2001-02-14 06:05 PM


S'en,
Thanks. I'll pass your wishes on to Lori. Oh, and I dig your new graphic!

Mike

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #12 » the imaginary fall

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary