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Passions in Poetry

No, Daddy! Don't make me watch Titanic again!

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Elizabeth Cor
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0 posted 03-16-2001 04:10 AM       View Profile for Elizabeth Cor   Email Elizabeth Cor   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Elizabeth Cor

After to being subjected to two of the most horrendous movies I believe I’ve ever seen (and shut off) just within the past week… I thought a contradictory question to the “favorite” thread was appropriate.

SO… what movies have actually caused you physical pain, retinal bleeding, and the like?


Mine:

Meet the Parents

Spoiler
(this must be some sort of torture device used in military prisons…)

The Watcher

Mission Impossible 2
(Warning: cannot even be used as a masochistic comedy, as can be done with films (heh) such as Dungeons and Dragons, Speed, Nottinghill, etc.)

… more I’m sure, but I’m starting to twitch.



[This message has been edited by Elizabeth Cor (edited 03-16-2001).]
Romy
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1 posted 03-16-2001 09:31 AM       View Profile for Romy   Email Romy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Romy

The Lost Souls
The Brady Bunch Movie
Mr. T and the Women? (I think that's what it's called, just came out with Richard Gere.)
Acies
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2 posted 03-16-2001 09:33 AM       View Profile for Acies   Email Acies   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Acies

Dr. T
Stallone movies



"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.
Poet deVine
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3 posted 03-16-2001 09:36 AM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine


Battlefield Earth - give me a BREAK!!!!
Skyfyre
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Sitting in Michael's Lap


4 posted 03-16-2001 11:12 AM       View Profile for Skyfyre   Email Skyfyre   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Skyfyre

Uhm ... retinal bleeding...?  Not sure that was the movie, Beth ...   LOL

Dungeons and Dragons has got to be up top somewhere *shudder* ... even geeks (like me) that PLAYED the darn game can't stand that flick ... I've seen PC games that had better plots.

Others:

The Talented Mr. Ripley (yaaaaawwwnn)

Eye of the Beholder (some people just SHOULDN'T do drugs)

ANYTHING with talking toasters, trains, toilets, etc (or purple "dinosaurs" who look like "eggplants," for that matter)...  

The Doors

Pulp Fiction (hehe)

Anything with Bruce Willis as the star ('cept maybe the Fifth Element -- and then only because the flick was good enough to overshadow his trademark bad acting)

Most older westerns ... you seen one, you seen 'em all.

Nicole
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5 posted 03-16-2001 01:06 PM       View Profile for Nicole   Email Nicole   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Nicole

Anything with sub-titles

Anything with Jackie Chan

12 Monkeys (plot...please?)

Event Horizon

The "Wee Sing" Video series (childrens' ... terrible ... ugh)

There are a couple more, but my subconcious has repressed them to the point of not remembering - let's hope they stay there.
Irie
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6 posted 03-16-2001 01:52 PM       View Profile for Irie   Email Irie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Irie

Magnolia What was that anyway?

Eyes Wide Shut Another Cruise bomb!

Any horror flick involving teenagers



~Sheri

"The things that come to those that wait may be the things
left by those who got there first"


Poet deVine
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7 posted 03-16-2001 04:41 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine


Oh!!! Eyes Wide Shut - one of THE worst of all time..what a waste...glad I only rented it...
Greeneyes617
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8 posted 03-16-2001 04:51 PM       View Profile for Greeneyes617   Email Greeneyes617   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Greeneyes617

Eyes Wide Shut, Southpark the movie, Cocktail, Mission Impossible 1 and 2, Dumb and Dumber, Uncle Buck.

I think thats about it (for now anyways)
Acies
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9 posted 03-16-2001 05:00 PM       View Profile for Acies   Email Acies   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Acies

Sky --- 6th Element was pretty good
Nicole --- Jackie Chan is hilarious
Greeneyes --- Dumb and Dumber is a classic

want a really bad one? here....

Van Damme movies



"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.
Severn
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10 posted 03-16-2001 05:21 PM       View Profile for Severn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Severn

Battlefield earth Sharon - that is A KILLER. HOW is it POSSIBLE that humans regress to the stereotypical cave-man status after aliens take over the planet?

HOW is it possible that said cave-men are able to fly US warplanes - a few days after they were taught by the 'hero' what A TRIANGLE WAS???? A TRIANGLE???? GOD!

For that matter - how DID the alien machine that taught the 'hero' the alien language also manage to teach him boiflippingphysics AND to read the English language?

Oh yes say the aliens - we can't ACTUALLY SPEAK the English language - in fact WE think these things whose planet we have conquered are animals who eat rats. (Ignoring the fact that this planet is covered in technology - inferior perhaps, but still - technology.) But yet, our machine which teaches this 'animal/hero/cave-man to speak our language also teaches him to READ BOOKS IN ENGLISH WHICH HAPPEN TO HAVE THE SECRET LOCATION OF WARPLANES IN FORT WORTH - oh and the American consitutional rights too.

Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

One final thing - the crowning glory - of Battlefield earth.

HOW is it John Travolta has 5 alien fingers in one shot and then 6 in the next and so on and so on?

ARGGGGGHHHH...

Btw Beth - Mission Impossible 2 has approximately '59 John Woo slow motion shots' - my friend and I were so bored during the movie we counted them. I think that is the right number lol.

Bad Movies:

-Men in Tights (gag)
-Anything Leslie Neilson
-Eyes wide shut
-Portrait of a lady
-Sommersby
-You've Got Mail (boo, spit, hiss)
-Coyote Ugly

there are more - can't rem - prolly cause they sucked.

K






[This message has been edited by Severn (edited 03-16-2001).]
Dopey Dope
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11 posted 03-16-2001 05:46 PM       View Profile for Dopey Dope   Email Dopey Dope   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dopey Dope

Down to Earth
Traffic

and so many more.....
DancinQueen
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12 posted 03-16-2001 05:49 PM       View Profile for DancinQueen   Email DancinQueen   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for DancinQueen

i hate to say it..but

Star Wars

and any movie with Chris Farley..hes funny, but how long can you laugh at that?


¤Sometimes the hardest thing to get over, is something you never really had¤
Christopher
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13 posted 03-16-2001 06:21 PM       View Profile for Christopher   Email Christopher   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Christopher

*shaking head*

Pulp Fiction rocked. Quentin Tarentino is da man!!! (Saw True Romance last night - I just LOVE senseless violence being shown as the solution to a problem!!! )

Jacki Chan rocks and is funny!!!

12 Monkeys - Nicole, I'm no longer your friend. One of the best movies I've seen.

Dumb & Dumber - CLASSIC!

Acire - that's 5th Element, and it too was AWESOME! Cult classic NOW!


Dancin' Queen - I don't know how to respond. Star Wars was visionary in its time. While not a wholly original plot, the movie deserves much for presenting visual effects that before had not been possible. George Lucas (stemming in a good part from the Star Wars trilogy) has helped revolutionize the way movies are shown on the big screen. And to boot, one acronym: THX. Nuff' Said.

Kamla - Battlefield Earth. Granted a wholly painful movie, though not without a few redeeming features (such as the end credits and laughing about it with Nicole as we were leaving the theater).

However - the movie (bought by John Travolta a good many years ago - Scientology and all that...) does no justice whatsoever to the book itself.

At over half a million words, believe me when I say it covers all your questions and more. Consider that The Stand (Stephen King) was made into an 8-hour mini-series and STILL left a LARGE portion of the book out. Now take an even larger book (Battlefield Earth) and condense it into less than two hours and give John Travola (puhleeeze) the chair and... well yeah.

The humans were not taught in a matter of days, though they did learn at an accellerated rate. A race of scholars - named the Chinkos by the Psychlos - were the ones who researched both Earth's history as well as it's language and cultures when the planet was conquered thousands of years prior. When conquered, the Psychlos (who are a powerful yet not entirely brilliant race of maschochistic beings (PURPLE in the book)who dominate through the bullying of other races through the use of a singular secret they have of teleportation) made it a sport to hunt humans, rendering them unable to live anywhere but in remote places surrounded by radiation (which is explosive to the 'breathe gas' the Psychlos breathe). I don't think it's unlikely that such a regression could occur given the time passed and the oppressive nature of the conquerors.

The Chinko machines that taught Johnny do so through waves passed into the brain. Once he learned the "basics" Johnny rapidly went on to learn as much as he could about everything (wouldn't you, if you had access to virtually instantaneous knowledge?). Things these machines taught were as mentioned, the history/language/culture of the now defeated planet as well as 'bioflippingphysics', mechanics, etc., etc.

Just a few words on one of my favorite books, with no intention of defending the movie whatsoever.

C


[This message has been edited by Christopher (edited 03-16-2001).]
PhaerieChild
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14 posted 03-16-2001 08:00 PM       View Profile for PhaerieChild   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for PhaerieChild

In no particular order of loathing, the nominees are:

Battle field Earth

Anything with Pauly Shore

Anything with Brendan Frasier

Anything with Charlie Sheen

The Waterboy (yuck)

The Cell

Rules of Engagement

Almost any space flick



How can you save me?
When the dark comes right in and takes me,
from my front walk and into bed,
where it kisses my face and eats my head. Shivaree
Severn
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since 07-17-99
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15 posted 03-16-2001 08:09 PM       View Profile for Severn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Severn

OH MY GOD

CHRISTOPHER - YOU DEFENDED IT. (note - distinction btwn book and movie noted...)

OH MY GOD.

I would be falling over if I wasn't sitting down already.

I think if you went into the movie after having read the book, then perhaps your scope was slightly broader. Sheesh - it was likely all quite logical in there...

And dear John was quite the alien wasn't he? Pah.

I was under the impression from the movie that the aliens hadn't been on the planet that long - certainly not long enough to collectively forget how to read and revert to cave-art echoing the type found in pre-historic times lol.

K
Acies
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16 posted 03-16-2001 08:24 PM       View Profile for Acies   Email Acies   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Acies

DQ -- Chris Farley? Tommy Boy was awesome

Kamla --- Anything Lelie Neilson...ain't he the guy in Schindler's List? That movie will go down as one of the best ever made. And I like Cayote Ugly as just a movie for relaxing.

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.
inot2B
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17 posted 03-16-2001 09:18 PM       View Profile for inot2B   Email inot2B   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for inot2B

"Dracula" w/James Wood or Woods. My husband took me to this horrible movie and I got up and spent over an hour in the lobby waiting for him to finish watching.
Poet deVine
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18 posted 03-16-2001 09:33 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine


ANY movie with Leslie Nielson in it or the words naked and gun in the title!

Dr. T and the Women - what a waste with no talent!!

The Thin Red Line - what a waste of talent!

Eddie Murphy movies (except Beverly Hills Cop I)

The Sixth Day - blech!

ANY Stallone movie..the man can't act!!


Dopey Dope
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19 posted 03-16-2001 11:35 PM       View Profile for Dopey Dope   Email Dopey Dope   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dopey Dope

Ok.....jot this down.....if it came down to ALL of us keeping this thread alive for eternity.....we'd had every movie in existance on the list......



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily
Severn
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20 posted 03-17-2001 01:53 AM       View Profile for Severn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Severn

Acies - that's Liam Neeson hon (Schindlers List - listed as one of my favs lol)

K


[This message has been edited by Severn (edited 03-17-2001).]
Ron
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21 posted 03-17-2001 03:05 AM       View Profile for Ron   Email Ron   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Ron's Home Page   View IP for Ron

This is fascinating and an indication, I guess, of why they make so many movies. It seem that no matter how bad a movie is, someone is going to like it, and no matter how good a movie is, someone is going to hate it. It at last answers a question I've had for years - as to why so many bad movies are made.

The worst movie of all time, the only one I literally could not sit through, was called The Toxic Avenger. That's all I remember, the name, and that might not even be totally accurate. The most amazing thing, though, was that years later I saw a sequel to it sitting on the shelf at my local video store. Go figure!

I do not and never have liked comedies. That's a little strange considering one of my favorite forms of entertainment is stand-up comedy, and perhaps an indication that more isn't always better. I saw Jim Carey in Vegas, long before he became famous, and thought he was a genius. I hate his movies. Of course, I'm probably also the only breathing male who thinks the Three Stooges sucked.

That's not to say, however, that I don't like funny movies, because I do. The difference between a funny movie and today's genre of comedies is story. The movies of Jim Carey, Leslie Neilson, Chris Farley, Chris Rock, and far too many others to list, are little more than two hours of one-liners and sight gags, with no underlying story. Nada. Zip. Zilch. Other comedians, like Robin Williams and Eddie Murphy, sometimes have a minor story line (Golden Child comes to mind, and certainly Beverly Hills Cop), but the balance is often too heavily tilted toward funny and not enough toward story. And some few artists, like Billy Crystal, the early Richard Prior, Steve Martin (sometimes), Sally Fields, and Tom Hanks know how to make humor an intricate part of the story.

I am a total sucker for good romantic comedies.  

Chris, while I haven't seen Battlefield Earth, another excellent example of what you described (along with The Stand) was Dune, based on the book by Frank Herbert. A masterful story, woven through a very complex society, that simply could NOT be translated to the screen successfully. More recently, Heinlein's Starship Troopers lost a LOT in the translation from page to screen. And do you remember the animated Hobbit? Yuck.

I disagree with you, however, about Star Wars, if only in a backhanded fashion. To concentrate too much on the visual effects, as outstanding as they were for that era, does the film a serious disservice. Lucas is a consummate story-teller and the SW trilogy represents the most condensed grab bag of writer's techniques I've ever seen. Parallel plots, character mirrors, you name it and Lucas used it. If I ever had the opportunity (or time) to teach a fiction class, Star Wars would be my textbook.

I don't watch a lot of movies, and haven't been in a theatre in at least six or seven years. I could fill a very long page with a list of the recent movies I would like to see when both opportunity and time present themselves. And, I'm sure, an even longer list of movies I wouldn't watch on a dare.  
Brad
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Jejudo, South Korea


22 posted 03-17-2001 08:23 AM       View Profile for Brad   Email Brad   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Brad

First,
Ron, I forgive you. It does take a certain sophistication to understand the comedic genius of the Three Stooges.


I understand.

If you start talking Andy Kaufman, you're in big trouble.

Now, the worst movie is tough. My wife and I went out to dinner tonight and we discussed it.

She said, "Austin Powers" -- she hates those films.

My decision: Ishtar.

Brad
Romy
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23 posted 03-17-2001 09:36 AM       View Profile for Romy   Email Romy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Romy

I can't stand all those slasher movies,
Nightmare on elm street,Halloween, etc...
Watching violence is not my idea of entertainment but I do like the old suspense movies...Hitchcock especially...and Jack Nickolson in "The Shining"...
Dusk Treader
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24 posted 03-17-2001 10:56 AM       View Profile for Dusk Treader   Email Dusk Treader   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dusk Treader

The worst movie I have ever seen has got to be "The Avengers." It was James Bond with stupid gadgets and even less of a plot... Me, my friend and my parents ALL slept through the last part of the movie, it was that bad! UGGG...

"And every state of mind, left to itself, every shutting up of the creature within the dungeon of its own mind - is, in the end, Hell" - C.S. Lewis

 
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