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Soulmates
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Soulmates |
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7 Member
since 2000-04-26
Posts 113Amherst, MA, USA |
I know this isn't exactly in the form of prose, but it definitely doesn't feel like poetry to me. To tell the truth I only wrote it in this form because the yahoo notepad i was writing it on does that stupid thing where if you keep writing in paragraph form it goes off the page and you have to scroll to read it... but I ended up really liking this way of writing. It's sort of like disconnected thoughts. So if it doesn't qualify as prose... banish me for life, I dunno. Also (I've been told not to make apologies before sharing my writing, but I really can't help it. I'm not that secure) this is another one of those whiny "Why doesn't he love me" things that I'm sure you're all sick of. But it isn't all that... it goes a little deeper I think. Please, tell me your thoughts. (names changed, even tho I know they'll most likely never come here, but hey, I'm paranoid) ****************************************** I wish Kevin would email me. I want to know how he reacted, what he thinks, what he feels. This way it just seems like he doesn't care. Elia would know how I feel if she weren't so damn blind. Poor girl... I wish she could realize he doesn't love her just so she can start to heal. I've started. Hell, I started a long time ago. The bastard just interrupted me. Heh. Girl, interrupted. Healing, interrupted. It's 12:39. Silent, like I'm the only person alive. If I were at college right now it would be just like 8 pm. Always someone to talk to. That's what they're doing now. Having fun at college. Good LORD. Good lord... Do I miss Lee? I regret throwing him away just so I could be thrown away by Kevin. But I don't think I want him back. I just miss having someone. Ironically, every time I have someone I want someone else. Maybe not ironically. Maybe that's just the way it works. Until you find The One. What was that Kevin said about soulmates? Here it is: 'Soulmates exist, the trick to them is that they are not always. I'm a strong believer in striving for self perfection, and that in order to bond totally on the spiritual level with another person, you must first understand your own spiritual self. So, if you want to be a someones soulmate, you need to become a perfect person (or at least come somewhat close).' -email, 4/11 Spiritual level. What on Earth is that? Let me rephrase... What OFF Earth is that? I wish I were still on comfortable speaking terms with him; I'd really like to explore this further. I don't consider myself a spiritual person because I don't know what it is. He was speaking of soulmates in a very different sense than I was. I was thinking of destiny, you know, 'meant to be.' I don't know. If something is meant to be, it is. But maybe there are many paths you can take, and no matter which choices you make you will be with this person. Maybe that's what soulmates are. But that would be destiny, of course, and I'm not sure about that. It's really very philisophical, and if I had time... What am I talking about? I have all the time in the world! I'm bored out of my mind here. Predestination is a pretty contradictive idea. The meaning, I suppose, would be that there is only one path... No, only one ending. So maybe there are many paths that lead to the same ending. Can you disrupt your destiny? No, because then it wouldn't be destiny. But who decides? There we go. There's what throws me off. The idea that you have a predestination assumes that someone created that destination before you began. And that someone knew what would happen. Well maybe it will just happen. I can't change it. What will happen will happen. No matter what road I choose, I'm going to choose it. I'm meant to. |
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WolfsMate Member
since 2000-01-14
Posts 121New York |
Liked this much. Nicely done. "You never have to worry...Never fear for I am near" |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
This very much reminds me of the many conversations I had and still have with myself on paper. Thanks for sharing it. I enjoyed reading this.  |
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Dawn Eclipse Senior Member
since 2000-01-31
Posts 637The Horsehead Nebula |
Very nicely done. I enjoyed your point of view and reasoning very much.  "Even a fool knows you can't touch the stars, but it doesn't stop a wise man from trying." Harry Anderson, "Night Court" *Cassandra Roseen* |
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