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Open Poetry #45
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serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738


0 posted 2009-09-21 02:50 AM


The Domino saw disarray,
and thought that none of this could do.
So she matched the pieces up--
pip-to-pip
'cause she "saw through"
the backs of them, in curlicued
stamps of black
like oreos,
and she told them to what to do.

"You there!" She grew feet to stomp
"You're out of line!"
She stopped to yank
a wild vine growing
as if to tease
her tidy palms and my dis-ease...
So she mopped her brow with leaves.
"You're not a two up top, you're three!"

We lined up accordingly.

She seemed to know just what to do

"Mind your bottom, that's a five.."
I calculated eight, within my mind,
I dreamed of how neat life would be
once we were set accordingly...

She made a pattern, and it fit:
Why, when we'd topple, we would quit
fidgeting discomforture--
she'd set us straight, so we'd endure

the downfall of ourselves.

There's no movement to this dance--
she had no pips, we had no chance
to score ourselves creatively.
We realized she was a blank
dependent on our splotches as

she fell -
we all cliff-dived the gravity--
in a pattern prettily...

A path of slattern slabs and that
is the math of domi-knows..
engineered just-so that she
has to be saved first

'cause we

all huff beneath her weight

waiting

for the rescue

orderly

waiting to be told

again

just how we should line up.

* * *




© Copyright 2009 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved
Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast
1 posted 2009-09-21 08:19 AM


ms serene...

I can just see you in line anywhere...

enjoyed your art lady!!

OwlSA
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa
2 posted 2009-09-21 01:29 PM


Once again I say how I enjoy the excellence of your mind, Karen.  So like your logical and lateral thinking to see dominoes and people mirrored in each other - and I SO enjoy your word play and how you expand the images into a movie, and with such delicious discussion along the way.  Magnificent poem, Karen, just up my street.  What a delight this would be for a teacher to use in an English poetry class!  

Owl

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
3 posted 2009-09-21 01:55 PM


she'd set us straight, so we'd endure

the downfall of ourselves.

Oh, wow!!! If I don't get to read anymore poems today, I have the satisfaction of taking this with me into the werk monster's lair. Magnificent!!


latearrival
Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499
Florida
4 posted 2009-10-01 06:48 PM


I am sure this one was missed and many would love to read it.Amazing quick witted mind to write like this. latearrival
latearrival
Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499
Florida
5 posted 2009-11-20 10:08 PM


still not seen by many.
ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
6 posted 2009-11-21 10:52 AM


I came for the taste of wisdom, and left with glee!
Serenity, you rock!

1slick_lady
Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace
7 posted 2009-11-21 11:01 AM


"You're out of line!"


hmmmmmmmm

Klassy Lassy
Member Elite
since 2005-06-28
Posts 2187
Oregon
8 posted 2009-11-21 02:27 PM


Mesmerized

I watch
the patterns of the vine,
wind and bind, till flanked and banked
and buttressed all...blank
circumspect in hands of fate,
taunting gaze, raze where I wait
and breath abates
each dot begotten parsec call
to perfect parse...
and watch them fall!


You are so brilliant, Karen.  I am completely in awe!  I hope the reads here become a domino effect.  This one should not be missed!  

  
(Parsec:  a unit of measure for interstellar space equal to a distance having a heliocentric parallax of one second or to 206,265 times the radius of the earth's orbit...)



  

[This message has been edited by Klassy Lassy (11-22-2009 06:32 PM).]

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