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Teen Poetry #8
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XxForever.BrokenxX
Senior Member
since 2008-01-20
Posts 891
Neverland

0 posted 2008-01-30 09:35 PM



Isn't something missing
from you'r stone cold
grasp, floating with ease
through this wind
blown grass?

I stand far away,
as you sit
surounded by blue;
I stand here
alone, watching you.

You'r eye's frozen shut
with splinters of frost, I
stand once again pretending
to be lost.

FoReVeR.BrOkEn

© Copyright 2008 Emmalee Yuri - All Rights Reserved
Ri
Member
since 2008-02-01
Posts 67
Blackburn, England
1 posted 2008-02-01 07:46 PM


Great semantic field, very fitting title.
overall, I like =)

Falling rain
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Member Elite
since 2008-01-31
Posts 2178
Small town, Illinois
2 posted 2008-02-01 10:38 PM


xXForever BrokenXx u never cease to amaze me. Keep up the good work!! =]
RevengeIsMine
Senior Member
since 2006-07-08
Posts 820
Australia
3 posted 2008-02-01 10:45 PM


Hmm I love this and it really is soo true.. ur talent seeps through every line and all i have to say is "Emily's gunna change the world some day, And she doesn't even know it"
rebelangelv
Senior Member
since 2007-05-28
Posts 538
usa
4 posted 2008-02-02 02:13 AM


ooo dang this was awsome!!!

only a vampire can love you forever.
forbidden to remember, terrified to forget

XxForever.BrokenxX
Senior Member
since 2008-01-20
Posts 891
Neverland
5 posted 2008-02-02 12:10 PM


thank you so much. I really really appreciate all the comments. Though I wonder what you see in this poem, I don't mean that in a bad way...well I wrote it but whatever...What I'm trying to say is, what do you think it means? Because I wrote it and I'm not sure what I'm talking about! all I did was get a picture in my head that turned into this poem. So tell me, what does it mean to you? Just to help me out here.

-how odd that must be. A poet not even knowing what her own poem is about.

FoReVeR.BrOkEn

hunnie_girl
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Member Elite
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567
Canada
6 posted 2008-02-02 04:13 PM


Emily!!!!! my fav from yooh AMAZING POEM!!!
Krysti

Earl Robertson
Senior Member
since 2008-01-21
Posts 753
BC, Canada
7 posted 2008-02-02 09:46 PM


Great style. Good poem. As for meaning welll
I was going to ask you myself.
I read this through a few times and was struck by the impression of unreturned romance. Like the speaker has been trying to get the other person to notice care for or love them. They ask the pleading question "isn't somthing missing from your stone cold grasp?". Then they go on to speak of the cold the desolation and the blindness that could be both their relationship or a discription of the others... personality.
Good...deep write.

"Be Strong and Always Remember what made you you." Earl

"Ooo!!! Ooo!! I know! I know! um...he he" Earl
(Yes I am crazy)

XxForever.BrokenxX
Senior Member
since 2008-01-20
Posts 891
Neverland
8 posted 2008-02-02 11:39 PM


yes Earl that makes sense! excuse me for a moment as i be my odd self ... "By George! I think we've done it!!!" ... okay im back. Thank you for explaining my poem to me. Maybe this is my own way of telling myself something, it does make sence that thats what it could be about... i think...

FoReVeR.BrOkEn

[This message has been edited by XxForever.BrokenxX (02-03-2008 01:39 AM).]

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