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Systematic Decay
Senior Member

since 1999-09-15

Posts 1301
That place with padded walls and funny people in white.........

0 posted 1999-09-24 02:34 PM

I am not the girl you know
I am not the monster you presumed
I am not anything you thought
I am not the shell you knew

It's all my fault
But I'm not to blame
I'm not suicidal
Extinguish my flame

Hatred so real
Always that itch
Groping in darkness
For the light switch

Make it all better
Leave me alone
I don't need a touchstone

I am not who you think I am
I'm not at fault
So blame it on me
I'm not real, I don't withstand

It's all my fault
Am I allowed?
Blame it on me
Are you followed?
Am I real?
Am i allowed?

I'm not black,
I'm not white
I'm not gray
Because I'm not here

Am I wrong?
Am I right?
I am nothing
I'm not real

What do you think?
Who am I?
Do I love you,
Or make you want to die?

Can I kill you?
Am I allowed?
If you scream,
Will it draw a crowd?

Can I pull this trigger
At you or me?
Am I allowed?

Can I end my suffering?
Am I allowed?
Am I ever?

Tinfang Gelion
Junior Member

since 1999-09-23

Posts 14
Rochester

1 posted 1999-09-24 02:54 PM

Give killing not a thought, for it is never worth a thought at all. I think I understand this, that people are taking your exterior surface too seriously, and not trying to understand who you really are on the inside.
Life can be lonely while you are young but college will most likely be a much better place. It means true freedom. Your new friends will have to rely on you as much as you will rely on them, since several of them are on their own finally.
Maybe I trailed a bit from the poem's main point, but life is mean to be lived no matter how much it hurts. All days that roll by will soon be gone. And I know the pain that comes from realizing your mistake before another criticizes you. And the pain of others knowing you in a way that is negative, unlike the real you .... that you might be afraid of exposing.

[This message has been edited by Tinfang Gelion (edited 09-24-1999).]

Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural

2 posted 2007-11-13 07:28 PM

Enjoyed

ARCTIC WIND

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