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Passions in Poetry

To Love or Not to Love---the premise of a question...

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Member Elite
since 06-26-2000
Posts 3219
Blue Heaven

0 posted 08-01-2000 05:23 PM       View Profile for Jamie   Email Jamie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Jamie's Home Page   View IP for Jamie

Better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.....a very famous quote...

What does everyone think?..

I speak from the view of the loved and lost.. and say.... whoever wrote that line was never really in love to begin with,,,,, I would much rather to have never loved at all at this point... and i have had nearly 4 years of living the loved and lost life...


Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil.
"Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely".

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 08-04-99
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1 posted 08-01-2000 05:33 PM       View Profile for Dark Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dark Angel

I have to go with " better to have loved and lost" Where would I be if I had never loved, I think I'd be lost.
Member Elite
since 02-10-2000
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Pickering, Ontario

2 posted 08-01-2000 05:47 PM       View Profile for Marina   Email Marina   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Marina

Always better to have loved and lost.  Although I usaully am on the losing end.  LOL

There is another famous quote......

Nothing ventured, nothing gained.


It is a blessing to have wings for words, and passion in pen
Marina Crossley

Kit McCallum
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since 04-30-2000
Posts 16920
Ontario, Canada

3 posted 08-01-2000 10:19 PM       View Profile for Kit McCallum   Email Kit McCallum   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kit McCallum

Oh Jamie ... better to have loved and lost I believe.  Being on the losing end may break one's heart, but it makes the winning end just that much sweeter when it does come around ... and it will!  I wrote in a poem once "I appreciate the bad days ... for without them, how can I possibly appreciate the highs" ... call me an optomist.  
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4 posted 08-02-2000 12:03 AM       View Profile for Butterflies_dont_cry   Email Butterflies_dont_cry   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Butterflies_dont_cry

When my heart is broken I would say better to have never loved at all which means never to hurt at all.  When I think of the feeling of actually being in love then I would say it's better to have loved and lost....geesh guess I don't have an answer do I  
Poet deVine
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5 posted 08-02-2000 12:53 AM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

I don't think I've ever truly been in love, so I'm not a good one to answer this (so why am I here you ask?)

I want to believe in love. I want to believe that losing love is just another 'change' in our life..that it's better to know love..even if it's for a brief moment, than to never know it. As painful as losing love can be, there is no greater joy than falling in love. The first time you 'connect' with someone is like discovering magic...don't give up....
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since 11-23-1999
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6 posted 08-02-2000 12:58 AM       View Profile for Sven   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sven

Indeed tis better to have loved and lost. . . becuase even though losing is painful. . . there's nothing like being in love. . .


That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl

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since 03-05-2000
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7 posted 08-02-2000 01:49 AM       View Profile for StarrGazer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for StarrGazer

I wrote this a few months ago ... it was originally posted in the pub, but I think it relays my thoughts on the subject so posting it here too

If you could experience love for just one day
Would you take the chance or throw it away?
Knowing when the day was over your heart'd be on the ground
Or whould you cherish the memory of a love so profound?
Is that one moment worth all that it would cost
Or would you live in misery at all that you had lost?

Do you search and search but never really find
Have you given up on love 'cause it's just too unkind?
Now, what if I told you it's always been there right beneath you eyes
And the heart that cannot see is the heart that always trys?

Never happy with what is there, always  wanting more
That we don't see the love, we lock it out the door
Do you see what I'm saying
Is my meaning not yet clear
Why is it so easy to listen
Yet so hard to hear?

Love is always  there for us be it by lover or friend
An undefinable emotion it knows no beginning or end
Just because it's not seen doesn't mean it's not there
And if you are ever in doubt just tell someone you care!!
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since 06-26-2000
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Blue Heaven

8 posted 08-02-2000 01:52 AM       View Profile for Jamie   Email Jamie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Jamie's Home Page   View IP for Jamie

Okay--- I agree,,, It probably is better that I had a great love for 15 wonderful years. But it doesn't make it any easier.
Poet deVine
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Hurricane Alley

9 posted 08-02-2000 02:18 AM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

If it was easy to get over it, then it wasn't as great as you thought....the better the love, the harder it is to recover from it's loss..
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since 08-04-2000
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10 posted 08-04-2000 06:31 PM       View Profile for PandorasBox   Email PandorasBox   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for PandorasBox

I just want to introduce myself and say hello everyone   And to add my 2 cents into this discussion.... Better to have loved and lost, and that's because what doesn't kill only makes you stronger.OK so you might feel like your going to die, but think .... This is making you stronger!
Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
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Listening to every heart

11 posted 08-05-2000 10:42 AM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

To love or not to love...


Choices, you've got to love 'em!
Member Rara Avis
since 08-02-99
Posts 9130
Purgatorial Incarceration

12 posted 08-05-2000 01:36 PM       View Profile for Christopher   Email Christopher   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Christopher


I don't know... it may be better... but it hurts... a lot.

Peace Jamie
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since 07-02-2000
Posts 39
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13 posted 10-28-2000 03:48 AM       View Profile for Tanga   Email Tanga   Edit/Delete Message     View IP for Tanga

My dearest Jamie:

An answer to your question.  Hugss <**>

"Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
They say love hides behind every door then I must be walking in circles.
A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.
Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world
Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened."
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Member Seraphic
since 01-18-2000
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with you

14 posted 10-29-2000 01:38 AM       View Profile for SEA   Email SEA   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SEA

Jamie~ I've learned something from everyone I've ever loved. I have some fantastic memories as well as some devestating ones.I've given heartache as well as recieved it.I don't think I would be who I am today without having loved and lost.....I like who I I think it's better to have loved.I can't imagine going through life not loving.....we just aren't made that way.We are supposed to love. There is always going to be the possibility of losing the ones you love, we are after all human.I think our life experience becomes richer when we love more. Just my take on it.   -SEA
serenity blaze
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15 posted 10-29-2000 01:48 AM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

Me?  I will jump into the possibility of anything, if only to escape the probability of NOTHING.  (but that's just ME...HUGS)
Member Elite
since 09-26-1999
Posts 2646
Ontario, Canada

16 posted 10-29-2000 08:55 AM       View Profile for Marilyn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Marilyn

If you have never loved then you do not know what it feels like to be complete. Imagine someone who has never known what it feels like to be unselfish, patient, giving, kind, gentle. True love is patient and kind, unselshish and tolerant. To never have felt that strength in emotion is to never had the oportunity to truely know yourself.

Each situation in our lives teaches us something about ourselves. We can take the experience and learn or we can wallow in the pain. Loving is a very good thing in whatever capacity we are capable of loving.

The secret in this area is being able to recognize a person who is like ourselves. Someone who can love in the same capacity as we can. To give love to another who can not return it in the same capacity is to look for heartache. There are things about ourselves that we can not change (or are unwilling to) and we must find someone who relates to those qualities.

Love takes time to develop and it is only time that can heal the pain of loss. I know this pain intimately but I am not afraid of loving again. Accually I look forward to finding the man I can love completely and truely. The one who wins my love will be a very lucky man. It will be complete and true. It will also not be given away foolishly; I have been down that road before.

Good luck to you and know that your friends keep you in their thoughts.


When you are old and grey and full of sleep,
And nodding by the fire, take down this book,
And slowly read, and dream of the soft look
Your eyes had once, and of their shodows deep;

How many loved your moments of glad grace,
And loved your beauty with love false or true,
But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you,
And loved the sorrows of your changing face...

William Butler Yeats
Moon Dust
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17 posted 10-29-2000 07:07 PM       View Profile for Moon Dust   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Moon Dust

I'd go with better loved a lost, because at least you know someone cared at one point than never at all.

Sometimes you have to let go and move on,
But never let go of the memories.

Member Ascendant
since 09-06-99
Posts 6390
Sunny Queensland

18 posted 10-29-2000 10:10 PM       View Profile for Isis   Email Isis   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Isis's Home Page   View IP for Isis

It is better to live a little, forever and a day, than to have no love, no brightness any day..

*I believe every time you put your words to paper, you change. Each feeling is set free, and you may follow.....*
~Isis~~Sovereign of the Spirit.
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19 posted 10-29-2000 10:42 PM       View Profile for LoveBug   Email LoveBug   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for LoveBug

I definently agree with this quote. Those who have loved and lost may have lost the greatest treasure that ever entered into their lives, but that also means, at one time, they possessed it. There are people that never possess the treasure, nor do they get to lay eyes on it. All they do is dream of it. Dreams are comfortable, but they aren't real. They are a shadowed reality, and they only comfort the poor souls that never really feel anything else. But those who have felt love have felt life, and even if the love ceases, the feeling that was felt can never be forgotten. Although they have only lived for an instant, they have really lived. The people who never love never really live. They don't know how it feels to lose something as wonderful as love, but it's only because they have never felt anything.

There's my 2 cents.

False gems may shine as brightly as the genuine article, but there are always those who can tell the difference.

[This message has been edited by LoveBug (edited 10-30-2000).]
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since 06-15-2000
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20 posted 10-30-2000 09:44 PM       View Profile for Erin   Email Erin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Erin

I agree and disagree with the quote. And here is why.

Agree: Because at least you feel in love and had someone but then something made that change. Your feelings didnt quite feel what they did before. And they gave up on something that they once thought was something really good to them.

Disagree: If you never loved someone then that means you never had the happiness of all good things that love brings. Those little things that make your day happier. The little things that make you smile. And those really happy moments that bring tears to your eyes because it makes you so happy.

I dont know if this makes any sense. Well to me it does. I dont know about the rest of yous.

But I would rather agree with the quote. To have something and then let things change. And besides for all the guys its better. It is (supposedly) a proven fact that when guys have a female companion around that they live like 5 years more (or 2??). Im not sure if that is exact or not.

~*Love is sometimes like a rose. Beautiful in the beginning but dies in the end.*~
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since 12-18-1999
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21 posted 10-31-2000 12:01 AM       View Profile for warmhrt   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for warmhrt

Anything in life that is worth anything involves risk. To love is to risk rejection, heart-ache, but weigh that against the possible gains. There is not a doubt that love is worthy of the risk.
mia to be somewhere better than in the middle...~Wallflowers
Member Seraphic
since 05-20-99
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Cape Cod Massachusetts USA

22 posted 10-31-2000 06:42 AM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

We really don't have a choice... Love wins..
Elizabeth Cor
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since 10-13-2000
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Oregon (yeah!)

23 posted 11-01-2000 06:55 PM       View Profile for Elizabeth Cor   Email Elizabeth Cor   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Elizabeth Cor

At my worst, I hate this quote. I wish had never known him. I hate myself for still caving in at the sound of his name. And every sweetness that filled me in places I hadnít fathomed rakes me open until I feel like I will physically die from anguish. Because of the intensity of my loss, I have grown in ways that only absolute despair can make a person grow. And I am a stronger, more amazing being because of it.
I am glad for that reason.
Even though, four years later, Iím still swimming in the grief of losing two weeks of perfection.

But I would kill for a second chance at anything resembling it, even if it ended as cruelly as the time before. And I pity anyone who hasnít known love in that kind of strength.

I donít know if that means I agree or disagree. Iím not sorry it happened 90% of the timeÖ what does that say?

Love does not begin and end the way we seem to think it does;
Love is a battle, love is a war, love is a growing up.

Dopey Dope
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24 posted 11-03-2000 02:20 PM       View Profile for Dopey Dope   Email Dopey Dope   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dopey Dope

Well i'd have to say that I'd rather not lose a love. Who wants that eh?
I strongly believe that if you have not experienced true love then you have not fully lived your life. But the quote, i think it can go you know where.
If you haven't loved.....then oK! It's better to love somebody and then lose them! So either love and keep.....or love none at all......

"I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust."

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!
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