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Open Poetry #34
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Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793


0 posted 2004-11-05 11:40 AM


You woke with a chill
And said the ache in you sent shivers
Against the sides of the tent
That threatened to collapse
With you trapped

The Lady Blue offers arms
To hold you if you are strong enough
But when you are ill
Her bed is miserable with smells
And the cold of her damp.

I built the fire up to a blaze
To sit you bundled
While I packed up the mismatched refuse
Of clothes and food
Then set you in front making room
That you might lay back

An hour later you stirred
As I dipped a J-stroke hard on the turn
In order to navigate us around
An old snag at the end of a run.

“Thirsty” you said
as you looked at me with feverish eyes
and misery wanting a warm bed
where everything was dry

I pulled loose a bottle of water
That you nursed while
Staring ahead
Then sat beside you
And lay back with closed eyes.

I counted strokes
  And knew there was 5 more miles or so
Before we hit Crawford’s store
But knew too he had a few cabins
Or would run us up river for a few bucks
And I could pick up the old truck
To drive us home.

I felt it then
The glazed daze of you
Tired to an end that left you sore
It was two hours later
When I saw Crawford’s
And pulled the nose to shore
Wading the Lady Blues slick ledge stone
That I saw your eyes again
And a wan smile

“I’m warm now”
you said

I just grinned
And said
“here, we’ll rest awhile”
………………………………….

Much later that night when the moon
Was dancing the lace of clouds
And the Lady Blue was singing her Gaelic tunes
You turned yourself to me
And I felt the fever of you as you said
“Please, sleep inside me.”
“I’d know the feel of your soul, if only for this hour”

I put you on my arm
     And tried to hum to you the words
Lady Blue taught me years ago
About healing and about alone

Hoping
  There was enough comfort in them
        
     You too could feel


© Copyright 2004 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
1 posted 2004-11-05 11:46 AM


Ahh....gads....
some may write one way,
others, their way...
you do it best
on the river's run.

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
2 posted 2004-11-05 11:55 AM




don't do it!

"cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind"
~Sarah McLachlan~

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
3 posted 2004-11-05 12:12 PM


LOL@Susan.

Maybe..she'll feel better in the morning.  

And you can continue the trip with her...and us.

We wait..and I hold my breath.

Captain, please tell me it's okay to exhale!

Now while the leaves still dance on the wind
While the moon and the clouds come spinning
Will you whisper my name again?
Again..and again.

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

4 posted 2004-11-05 12:36 PM


You turned yourself to me
And I felt the fever of you as you said
“Please, sleep inside me.”
“I’d know the feel of your soul, if only for this hour”

methaphoic and mystic sees through skin
this was amazing

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
5 posted 2004-11-05 12:59 PM


Ron

Just the right touch of wondering what will happen to keep the reader waiting for the next installment.  What a good writer you are!  

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

6 posted 2004-11-05 02:53 PM


and that you do, you do so well...

you should bottle this stuff, Cap.


scorpio
Member Ascendant
since 2002-10-02
Posts 5178
right...there
7 posted 2004-11-05 03:01 PM


Ron, I can tell you've live what you write.  Any poet who writes about paddling a canoe single-handedly with the j stroke has used that stroke. And it's these experiences that gives your words such validity to me.  

believe in what your heart feels...

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

8 posted 2004-11-05 05:27 PM


Another beauty for my library, can't wait for the next one Sir.

Mxx

into this night i wonder, it's morning that i dread, another day of knowing of, the path i fear to tread.
~Sarah McLachlan~

kayjay
Member Elite
since 2002-06-24
Posts 2015
Oregon
9 posted 2004-11-05 06:09 PM


This is a great story, all by itself, tho' I suspect there is more to be told.  Well done.  KJ

Through rubble and trouble and dark of night
The yawn of a dawn will hasten the light

babygirlwlove
Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180
New York City
10 posted 2004-11-05 08:11 PM


That threatened to collapse
With you trapped

The Lady Blue offers arms
To hold you if you are strong enough
*************************************'
wow....just wow...chief...

you leave me once again, in awe...
**babyblu**

**Intoxicant to the SouL**

Susan
Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104
walking the surreal
11 posted 2004-11-05 10:35 PM


I love the mood your writing sets with me - I get lost in the feel of your words - much enjoyed-

Susan

Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you.  Joy is a state of mind.

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