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No Title ( No Time )
| Teen Poetry #6 |
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No Title ( No Time ) |
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Riley 
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038in the pouring rain 
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sparkling goodness risen in the eye the unknown is there hiding behind a smile i have found it piece by piece in the heart of my beloved is a part of my soul i cry for all the times wanting to tell you so much that i did love you deep down ~*Theres a sparkle in your eye that only i see, and theres a place in your heart where only i wanna be*~ |
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| © Copyright 2002 Riley Grant - All Rights Reserved | |||
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quietlydying
since 2001-06-10
Posts 935the wonderful land of oz |
you should really use some punctuation in your piece. just as every sentence ends with a period, every poem should, or else it doesn't end. and so forth. /jen/ so foul and fair a day i have not seen. - macbeth act 1, scene 3 |
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Masked Intruder
Moderator
Senior Member
since 1999-05-23
Posts 1231Near golden sunsets |
I disagree. Punctuation isn't mandatory in poetry. Sometimes lacking punctuation adds to the piece and how it can be read. The absence of punctuation can also add to the mood of a piece. In this case, Riley, I like seeing no punctuation. You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep. -- Navajo Proverb |
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Riley
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038in the pouring rain |
Hey! Ok about this punctuation thing, I don't use punctutation in poetry. I never have and probably won't but a couple of times. I just have never written with it and don't find it neccesary and don't feel that I want it in my pieces. Thank you both for replying! Riley ~*Theres a sparkle in your eye that only i see, and theres a place in your heart where only i wanna be*~ |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
Punctuation can be good but only if you feel it is necessary. I agree with you that punctuation can be very confusing and often unnecessary. Personally, I usually don't punctuate my poems at the end of each line. I use commas, sure, but I am most likely to just let the poem go through. There are so many other ways to moderate the reading flow, aside from punctuation. Many poets, like you, use line breaks to decide when a pause in speech should be issued. I usually use that in conjunction with a meter scheme and patterns in line sizes. It can be done in so many ways without punctuation. This piece doesn't require it at all. I like the brevity of the piece. You expressed yourself in very short terms, which I'm really not used to seeing from you. "Piece by piece" and "deep down" are kind of cliche, but other than that, you wrote well. I'd add a stanza or two in addition to ommitting the aforementioned blips on my cliche radar.  Nice work, nonetheless. Parasite Learn to place poetry before people |
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