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Open Poetry #10
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Unraveling
| Open Poetry #10 |
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Unraveling |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738
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A cat in claw upon the screen tiger-eye sees everything... twisting twice de-coder ring-- I hear the birds BEFORE they sing. (Tell me, tell me) Tell me all... do angels really CHOOSE to fall? Is everything a chosen path? Will I ever not feel lack? Is all that rhymes a waste of time-- free verse just methodic curse? (Tell me it won't always hurt...) Say I have a chance. And in the ticking of the clock-- confide--do you also take stock? Humanity within a pen Reality of flesh made sin... (I am. I AM) unraveling... pulling thread most willingly. I stand outside myself. I think... |
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| © Copyright 2000 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Daniel J D Senior Member
since 2000-10-01
Posts 1471Hillcrest, Queensland, Australia |
Serenity, Imaginative and creative, a beautifully worded poem. "Is all that rhyme a waste of time". No, never, the meaning of words is timeless. "I stand outside myself". What a remarkable phrase indicating the poet is ready to look in from the outside. Super. Respond to my call and let the waves of my heart fill your life with the wonders of love (Daniel J D) |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
S'en* I fell into this one hard sweetie!!! The whirlpool of this one swept up my emotions and sent me spiraling! You have such a gift for this type of writing...it sings SERENITY...Love ya my dear friend..((hugs))~ |
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tracie66 Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713Australia |
Serenity~ God what an amazing read, flows beautifully  great writing~HUGS~ Tracie~ Love is the life of the soul... It is the harmony of the universe |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Serenity~ 'And in the ticking of the clock-- confide--do you also take stock ?' EVERYDAY ! ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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ma miller Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 806 |
interesting, serenity ... there's a naked rawness to the tone (that i like much) ... nice work |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
(Tell me, tell me) Tell me all... do angels really CHOOSE to fall? Is everything a chosen path? Will I ever not feel lack? Is all that rhymes a waste of time-- free verse just methodic curse? (Tell me it won't always hurt...) Say I have a chance. =============== Humanity within a pen Reality of flesh made sin... (I am. I AM) unraveling... pulling thread most willingly. I stand outside myself. I think... =============== you need only yo see your self thru our eyes... or better yet...thru your own poetic eyes NEVER doubt your poetry ... and never doubt you .. BOTH are a gift... this one proves my point ... your not coming unraveld.or undone ... your becoming an exceptional poet me |
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Wilfred Yeats Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704Wilmington, Delaware |
at times i feel this way - but I get over it - something good happens - if not whatI want- but it keeps me going - {{{hugs}}} |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Serenity--You are unraveling and all the little twisty turns of the thread are so clear...this is great poetry, my friend! |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
I can't think of anyone I would like to unravel with more...this is pure serenity  |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
If you are unraveling my friend then it is only to shed the silken threads of beauty you are gifted with to share them among the friends that you have shown so much of your heart to. Wonderfully expressed as usual......but then who would have thought less from one of the "TRUE SPIRITS" of today's poets. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I wanted to thank everyone individually---but wow...just know that you are all very dear to me...and I appreciate this SO much. You all have rendered me speechless. *THUNDEROUS APPLAUSE* Much love back atchya. |
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