»
Archives
»
Dark Poetry #2
»
The Decieved
| Dark Poetry #2 |
|
The Decieved |
|
|
LyricFetish Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 528North Carolina 
|
Prisoner of dusk and stone My mind falls with the night This wind will cut me to the bone Yet none will hear my plight Such chilling dark behind my eyes Afraid to see the truth A vacant stare, my own disguise The memories of my youth An ancient sun who turns her head And grants the demons leave I cannot breathe amongst the dead My soul too cold to grieve Hark, the world is fading grey Shadows streak across the sky Destiny shall have her prey There is none but she and I Helplessly I watch my seconds Slipping through her hour glass Silence falls, her finger beckons This my end, my final mass One foot forward, then the other Cold consumes and kills my breath 'Dear, God made us for eachother,' One lasting lie to seal my death It's so obvious That the promise Keeps me here Painting pictures where All the colors Disappear *Lit |
||
| © Copyright 2000 Meredith - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
SpitFire Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396 |
~Oh my,...totally impressed here. This is soo well written and reads the same way. Superb. Will be looking for more of your work. Take care now. *Peace. |
||
catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Great poem! Incredible images, loved evrything about it. Hope you aren't feeling as sad as this, though. "If a man moves you to feel like a woman, the least you can do is let him." Merrit Malloy |
||
|
firejerm Member
since 2000-06-13
Posts 217Springfield, OH, good ol USA |
You know one thing you all will learn about me is that I don't give a "formal" review, I'm very laid back and up front. This poem totally kicked ass. This reminds me of the stuff I wrote going through high school. I was able to look back through life and see all the pain again. This was well said. Whatever you were trying to say here, spoke to me intimately! Keep it up! Jerm "Those little slices of death, how I loathe them." -Edgar Allen Poe |
||
|
Hardrock Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 948New Hampshire, USA |
LF...well done. Nicely constructed, great imagery. Enjoyed it. Hardrock |
||
|
lotharingia Senior Member
since 2000-06-04
Posts 897saarbruecken, Germany |
Firstly, Good name you've got there! Secondly, brilliant poem. ReALLy gOOd! I agree with the others. And hope to see more of your stuff here in future! Lotharingia "For God's sake, he's a poet. Poets are meant to feel miserable. Otherwise, what the hell are they here for? What are they going to write about?" Tom Holland |
||
|
LyricFetish Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 528North Carolina |
My thanks to all of you! This one basically just flowed out of me. Peace out! *~Meredith~* It's so obvious That the promise Keeps me here Painting pictures where All the colors Disappear *Lit |
||
|
kynder Senior Member
since 2000-04-11
Posts 537Tallahassee, Florida |
it just flowed outta ya, huh?? what a river of natural poetic soul you have. exquisite piece here. loved it. kynder Across the gateway of my heart, I wrote "No Thoroughfare!!" But love came laughing by and Cried "I enter everywhere!!!" Herbert Shipman |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
