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Open Poetry #9
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ladysixstring
Member
since 2000-07-27
Posts 374


0 posted 2000-08-19 03:10 AM


I want to write a poem and give it no name
Untitled, unclaimed
I want to say something but Im afraid to offend
Where to begin

You blame poverty
Claim it robbed you of your precious dreams
No way out, or so it seems
Destiny yelds a stronger hand
Or so it seems
So it seems


I want to write a song and give it no words
Never sung, never heard
I want to make you feel, but I'm afraid to create
Feelings of hate

You wear long sleeves
To cover your heart, it's out there for all to see
No hidden corners, no privacy
Destiny yelds a stronger hand
Or so it seems
So it seems



-jaimie
www.ladysixstring.com



© Copyright 2000 Jaimie D. Travis - All Rights Reserved
Saunni
Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 1777
West Virginia
1 posted 2000-08-19 03:30 AM


This is absolutely awesome! Some great writing here! I loved it!

Sauni

Sauni :)
Have you ever known the color grey when the nighttime finds you weak
I have, I've walked that road each time; that's where my angel sleeps

Poetry Princess
Junior Member
since 2000-08-19
Posts 28
Des Moines, IA
2 posted 2000-08-19 04:09 AM


Words never heard are often never understood. what an awesome way of writting it without giving a reason or an answer to why.  Great JOB!
Paula Finn
Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546
missouri
3 posted 2000-08-19 04:28 AM


Sometimes whats left unsaid is more poignant than whats spoken...great write here.
ladysixstring
Member
since 2000-07-27
Posts 374

4 posted 2000-08-19 10:13 AM


Saunni, Poetry Princess, Paula Finn... Thank you!

-jaimie
www.ladysixstring.com



Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
5 posted 2000-08-19 10:33 AM


Hi ladysixstring,
I believe this is my first visit to your place. I liked what I have read, and wait to see more. And, I'm glad that I stopped by.


Local Rebel
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767
Southern Abstentia
6 posted 2000-08-19 10:39 AM


Ah, a songstress in our midst....

well played... i could hear it

ggrn3
Member
since 2000-08-17
Posts 433
Nahunta Georgia U.S.
7 posted 2000-08-19 12:10 PM


Ladysixstring
Awesome as always. You want to "write a song and give it no words... Never sung, never heard." Beautiful. I've often found that Instrumental versions of a song often let you interpret your own words.

Garfield

Sunnyone
Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334
Staffordshire, England
8 posted 2000-08-19 03:20 PM


ladysixstring....

      This really is a song.....may I plug in my synth and play along?  Great writing!!


Today is a gift....
That is why they call it
'the Present'!



doreen peri
Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
9 posted 2000-08-19 03:43 PM


fabulous! outstanding, miss musician lady... loved this!!      
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
10 posted 2000-08-19 04:56 PM


this is the first of yours I have read, but it won't be the last I'm certain  
Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
11 posted 2000-08-19 05:58 PM


I had a friend once in to substance abuse and he lost everything.....he blamed all around him and cried for pity and he always wore long sleeves to hide what was really his love....his damn track marks....I dont know why but your verse threw me back into this memory......I hope I didnt miss anything or carry it to a place of misgiving....    Beautiful words and lyrices???....yes.

[This message has been edited by Mark Bohannan (edited 08-20-2000).]

Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
12 posted 2000-08-20 02:09 PM


I would have to agree with Mark on this one. . . break out that six-string and see what happens. . . you never know. . .

Well done. . . just excellent. . .

--------------------------------------------------------

That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl


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