You Make Me Feel Whole - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

Critical Analysis #1

You Make Me Feel Whole

Steggy
New Member

since 1999-07-08

Posts 4
Cape Cod

0 posted 1999-08-07 08:22 AM

You make me feel whole;
You fill my empty space.
You're the inspiration in my soul,
And you help me keep my pace

You're the apple of my eye;
You make me feel light as a feather.
You are the sun in my sky;
Your light shall live forever.

If I'm the jelly or the fluff,
You are my peanut butter.
You have that special stuff
That sends my heart aflutter.

My love for you has no exception,
For you complete my incompletions.

Sue
Member

since 1999-08-04

Posts 383
France

1 posted 1999-08-07 02:32 PM

I like it, it's fun. Could I suggest that something like "You are my sunny weather" instead of "You make me feel light as a feather" would improve the beat?

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.