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Open Poetry #45
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I Saw Your Ghost.
| Open Poetry #45 |
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I Saw Your Ghost. |
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viking_metal Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337In a Jeep, Minnesota. 
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At the end of my shift I saw your ghost, beautiful and real, elegantly walking through double doors in a clouded gray mist. I saw your ghost with long, shiny, oak tree hair pulled into a pony's tail. I saw your ghost, and she saw me from the corner of perfect eyes that see for miles hidden behind dark frame glasses. How I wished to take them off. _______________________________________ -P Everyone deserves to be loved, even you. |
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| © Copyright 2009 Paul Weisbrod - All Rights Reserved | |||
Kaoru
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892where the wild flowers grow |
From what I've read of you (and I will admit, that with my long absence I missed quite a bit of poetry), this poem is different than the rest.. And although I thoroughly enjoy all your other writings, I must say that this one in particular struck a chord. Very good writing here. Beautiful. |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
kewl stuff paul...she does seem to get around yes? |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
'shiny, oak tree hair' cool description! |
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viking_metal Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337In a Jeep, Minnesota. |
Kaoru, my dear... Thanks. When I wrote it I felt like it wasn't right. Reading it now, I think it's a step forward into a better direction for my writing. Dark... She's a bit of a wraith. Disappearing and reappearing. Midnite... Thanks.  Everyone deserves to be loved, even you. |
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brneyedgrly Senior Member
since 2009-06-08
Posts 1125nowhere and everywhere |
wow...this poem is so haunting and not because it is about a ghost |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
Ah, so mysterious those wraiths. I've not been here for a long time, but am glad that I wandered in today in time to catch this. Very intriguing read! |
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viking_metal Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337In a Jeep, Minnesota. |
Brown eyed mademoiselle... I thank you. I hope the spirit of the haunting is pleasant. Gentle Spirit... And I too am glad you showed up. Thanks for reading, I'm glad you enjoyed it. -P Everyone deserves to be loved, even you. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I thought I had words to convey my appreciation for this write, but then I saw your critique message and completely lost my train of thought. *laughing* But I do love your poem! *S* |
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viking_metal Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337In a Jeep, Minnesota. |
Thank you Suthern. You're too kind. Everyone deserves to be loved, even you. |
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Alison
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
Maybe your ghost would get on with suthern's poltergeist? A haunting thought for sure. You know I love your poetry 'cause I do. A |
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viking_metal Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337In a Jeep, Minnesota. |
Glad to hear I still have you reeled in.  Thanks Alahoon. -P Everyone deserves to be loved, even you. |
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steavenr Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058 |
man....sounds like you got it bad... found this phrase: "I saw your ghost with long, shiny, oak tree hair pulled into a pony's tail" ...CAPTIVATING...stops the reader right in his tracks...excellent imagery |
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viking_metal Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337In a Jeep, Minnesota. |
Thanks Steve. I'm happy you enjoyed the poe-um. Thirty bits of glass had become my teeth, |
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