Has anyone here seen grandma
Weve been searching high and low
It's time she joined the senior's home
But she doesn't want to go
She packed up all her make-up
Paid her botox bill in full
Her kids think she should act her age
She thinks that that's bull!

Her hair salon is worried
Her dye job is almost due
She comes like clockwork every week
They'll miss the revenue
The old age club is miffed
She never joins the group
And tries to lure the rest of them
To come and fly the coop!

Last week she went dancing
And partied all night long
Then someone handed her a mike
And she sang a bawdy song
Please help us to find grandma
She's getting much too bold
She decided she's too young for us
For she's never growing old!