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Open Poetry #39
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MsSouthernOrchid
Member
since 2003-07-12
Posts 192


0 posted 2006-11-25 12:45 PM



  Was It You?
    ______


Was it you I saw?
Dressed in blue jeans
and that well worn
baseball cap,
looking as if you'd
just rolled out of bed
after a mid day nap,
standing on the corner
over a newspaper rack,
rummaging through
the headlines,
the sun glistening
on your back?
Was it really you
suddenly standing there,
giving me a start,
or just my mind
playing tricks
on my broken heart?

[This message has been edited by MsSouthernOrchid (11-26-2006 12:10 AM).]

© Copyright 2006 MsSouthernOrchid(Mary) - All Rights Reserved
shirtless
Member
since 2006-04-29
Posts 359

1 posted 2006-11-25 02:08 PM


The pep of the short lines and the description rich in detail suggest the  broken heart is mending. I really enjoyed your poem. Thanks.

Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
2 posted 2006-11-25 03:39 PM


Well done, it has all the angst of seeking a lost love.
Cheers

Kethry

a good commitee can decimate communication.

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
3 posted 2006-11-25 08:26 PM


I have missed your poetry.  Welcome home.

And for me?  This is a timely post,
so I thank you,
from within.



Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
4 posted 2006-11-25 08:34 PM


Thanx for the share of a piece of your
heart and poetic soul...enjoyed!

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
5 posted 2006-11-25 09:10 PM



Beautiful...this touched me.  

Autumn, the year's last loveliest smile~
                                    

MsSouthernOrchid
Member
since 2003-07-12
Posts 192

6 posted 2006-11-26 12:16 PM


Thank you all for the kind words about the poem. After reading it over again tonight, I decided to make a couple small changes in the wording so I did some editing.  I think it reads a little better now. Thank you Sunshine for the welcome back.
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
7 posted 2006-11-26 09:47 AM


Ms Orchid

The heart is sometimes a trickster.  

wredgranny
Member
since 2006-11-18
Posts 493
Ky. USA
8 posted 2006-11-26 12:16 PM


or just my mind
playing tricks
on my broken heart?

Siyo MsSouthernOrchid how many of us have seen and felt these things,yes,thank you for the voicing!


  granny!

Roniece Dawson-Bruce
Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689
Sydney, Australia
9 posted 2006-11-27 01:55 AM


oooh just beautiful ....was it him??

Be well
Roniece

Interloper
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369
Deep in the heart
10 posted 2006-11-27 09:32 AM


Well done!
I loved it

Poet, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write.

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