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Open Poetry #39
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Magnus
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South Carolina, USA

0 posted 2006-09-26 05:37 PM


I’m sitting,  seconds traipse by my feeble mind,  a mind awash
In the brine of a day when thoughts stumble and fall,  when
A next move is like a pawn’s move….1 or 2 forward,  nothing
Back….But,  I have it backwards….

I cannot remember my next move,  I thought of it,  had it there
Upon my tongue and suddenly it slips away…awash in that
Bitter brine…

Frustrating,  not knowing my next move because my mind does
Not remember what it was or should be until suddenly, without
Warning….no notice given…..nor quarter…and it is there,  the
Water’s salt puckering the tongue and lips…Ah, but to have
The sweetness of a cherry with a light bit of tart added.

Nights bring out the stars…shimmering high above,  sprinkling
Starlight upon us….wishing upon a moon…    The chill of an
Evening among the cacti and mesquite…the dance of a  bat
Chasing an unseen insect….the howl of a coyote….all so
Apparent but fading…

Yes,  fading….just as the memories of those we have loved….
Lying beneath the earth….awaiting the joining of hands…

For he shall remember thee if thee remember him…if the
Mind doesn’t fade too rapidly...too soon.

[This message has been edited by Magnus (09-26-2006 07:42 PM).]

© Copyright 2006 Barry J. Tackett - All Rights Reserved
The Lady
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634
The Southwest
1 posted 2006-09-26 10:07 PM



brilliant and
so poignant
Barry...

Seymour Tabin
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since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
2 posted 2006-09-26 11:03 PM


Barry,
Lets hope for the best. Good write

Earth Angel
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since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
3 posted 2006-09-28 10:28 AM


Barry, at one point I thought you were ~

oh, oh, I forgot what I was going to say!

~ Now I remember, I thought you were going through menopause!

Not to make light of your post, it truly was touchingly poignant.


Linda

Enchantress
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since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
4 posted 2006-09-28 01:51 PM


LOL@EA's response!
A most excellent write Barry..
...um..yes, it is Barry right?

I'd know you anywhere.

Hopefully we can maintain our memories for a very long time.

Hugs #? going out your way, Nancy.

~Autumn, the year's last, loveliest smile~

Magnus
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South Carolina, USA
5 posted 2006-09-28 05:19 PM


Thanx all,  it has been frustrating to a
degree....think of something...turn
around and stand there, looking and feeling
stupid..and then, a minute or two later,
presto, everything is ok...

aziza
Member Elite
since 2006-07-09
Posts 2995
Lumpy Oatmeal makes me Crazy!
6 posted 2006-09-30 12:00 PM


You know, sometimes I read a poem and just sit and savor each word.  I simply slip between the lines and am part of it.  Thank you for allowing me to do this with your poem.

Alison

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
7 posted 2006-09-30 12:11 PM


Barry, there were so many visions that popped into my head while reading through this...

I like it when a poem makes me see things with my eyes open

miscellanea
Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060
OH
8 posted 2006-09-30 06:37 AM


Barry,

   This is exquisite!  I sense such sensitivity purity of thought.  Can you tell this is an all-time favorite?  Written like lazy river, so ever gently.  I do hope your health has not inspired this.  If so, my thoughts are with you.


miscellanea

miscellanea
Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060
OH
9 posted 2006-09-30 06:41 AM


Clicked; placing on the shelf...
nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
10 posted 2006-09-30 09:22 AM


Barry...
"For he shall remember thee if thee remember him…if the
Mind doesn’t fade too rapidly...too soon."

smiling a "knowing" smile...


M

garysgirl
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since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
11 posted 2006-09-30 01:03 PM


Barry, I also understand this completely.
You wrote my thoughts, at times. It kinda
worries me sometimes. LOL
Huggles,
Ethel

banished_fairy
Junior Member
since 2006-10-02
Posts 31
Happy in H*ll, PA
12 posted 2006-10-02 03:48 PM


An excellent poem worth reading over and over again.
At first I was lost, confused as the author then ...."presto". Everything came into focus. The words sent me exactly where you wanted me and that is a hard thing to accomplish.

SO BRAVO!!!

scorpio
Member Ascendant
since 2002-10-02
Posts 5178
right...there
13 posted 2006-10-02 04:11 PM


This strikes a chord Barry.  Well done!!

believe in what your heart feels...

Magnus
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South Carolina, USA
14 posted 2006-10-02 05:13 PM


Hi Scorpio, you have been missed....

thanx for the comments.

iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
15 posted 2006-10-02 07:34 PM


  .....*hugs*....jo
suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
16 posted 2006-10-03 10:20 AM


I cannot remember my next move,  I thought of it,  had it there
Upon my tongue and suddenly it slips away…awash in that
Bitter brine…

Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt... forgot where I put it. *S*

Welcome to senior moments, my friend. *S* Just don't lose your pen! *S*

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