navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #38 » Recalling The Cold Sea.
Open Poetry #38
Post A Reply Post New Topic Recalling The Cold Sea. Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Goldenrose
Member Elite
since 2003-05-30
Posts 3665


0 posted 2006-07-27 06:24 PM


You were alive then,
i mean really alive.
The long hours of
happy laughter, on endless
summer days;the rock
pools, the hushing waves.
Sunshine sheening your face,
tousled hair in soft rain,
and you will always
be that way, sweet
child in time;frozen
featured sister of mine.
How would you look?
be? To me now?
Gone to a world
far removed from here,
but each day tightens
a grip inside me,
since the sea beckoned
and you fell beneath
waves, forever dreaming of
mortal life, forever haunted
by your slow slide,
beneath a cold sea.

© Copyright 2006 P.D - All Rights Reserved
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
1 posted 2006-07-27 07:29 PM


OMG! This is heart-ripping!

reminds me of the Titanic

what emotion, what a scene...wow

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
2 posted 2006-07-27 09:53 PM


Phil, chilling but fantastic write.
This soul shall remain with you forever,
for you've kept her spirit afloat with these loving words. Heart hugs to you.

seraphin
Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1004
Michigan
3 posted 2006-07-27 10:28 PM


The wonderful thing about this creation is how the end so perfectly frames the work. I know I am explaining this badly, but the beginning is perfect and the ending surpasses even that. A beautiful piece.
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
4 posted 2006-07-27 11:01 PM



A heart aching....to be sure.
Whether fiction or fact,
this grips.

Thank you for sharing.


Goldenrose
Member Elite
since 2003-05-30
Posts 3665

5 posted 2006-07-28 04:45 AM


Thank you for replying to this everybody, it is in fact fiction. A tv programe lead me to thinking of how i would be, if as in this situation, a younger sister had been taken, drown and been forever the same age, never growing old but always frozen in time, how would i feel? thank you so much for commenting, on what was at first an experiment, then something that i am now proud to have created from seemingly ''a feeling''..

Goldenrose.

A Romantic Heart
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-03
Posts 5496
Forever In Your Heart
6 posted 2006-08-08 12:00 PM


I came by to take a peek, just for a few minutes and my heart was touched by this piece, beautiful work, one of my favorites of yours!
Goldenrose
Member Elite
since 2003-05-30
Posts 3665

7 posted 2006-08-08 12:08 PM


Thank you ARH for your kind reply...

Goldenrose.

A Romantic Heart
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-03
Posts 5496
Forever In Your Heart
8 posted 2006-08-08 12:12 PM


You are welcome! good to see your poetry growing and more alive than ever!

~ARH

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
9 posted 2006-08-08 12:31 PM


I saw in one of the replies that you wrote, how this poem came into being.
The believability of your words illustrates the depth of your talent ~ and empathy.

Loving Light,
Linda

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

10 posted 2006-08-08 12:40 PM


sad, but expressed well, a dedication which is long remembered through the sands of time...well done

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
11 posted 2006-08-08 02:03 PM


You paint the life so vividly it makes the loss more poignant... much as it would surely be. *S*
Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #38 » Recalling The Cold Sea.

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary