navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #38 » What do Daisies Know of Hell?
Open Poetry #38
Post A Reply Post New Topic What do Daisies Know of Hell? Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
the quell
Member
since 2006-07-19
Posts 144
Liverpool, UK

0 posted 2006-07-24 08:36 PM


What do Daisies know of Hell?

I’ll always be the skeleton in your closet
The Minotaur, roaming the fevered labyrinth
Of your psyche
I’ll haunt the fleecy, foam-embellished shore
Of your solemn, sunken isle – a weeping diamond in the feral dawn
Bejewelled.
Intangible as the delicate magic that shimmers and breathes
Behind my television screen.

Through an ice-edged lens, we exchange…
A single glance
You keenly exhibit the frozen smile
Of a man who has forgotten how to cry
Anything, to paint a new history
Anything to forget.
I’ll cram our dirty memories into a red velvet clutch-bag
And stride indifferently from your side
(Although I seem to have misplaced
My legs…and…
My soul.)
Knocking aside the cobwebs, and the dust-riddled past
I ignore the tangled shoals of stars, glistening behind your eyes
Tears, faded as the newly risen dead

You always were like television, to me
Casting the world into sharp, sharp focus.
Bringing life closer to my eyes – dragging it further from my soul
“Oh, you occupied my time…”
You live for dreams, and so you live not at all.
Constructing shrines to the deity of soap opera
My face, lost
In the shadows of time
Begone, my dear. Paradise beckons
Heaven is no more than a trendy Parisian café
(I’d never fit in…)
And God – God is a pavement artist
A long-haired student with nothing better to do.
Plucking dreams from the air, drunk on the pungent wine of righteousness
(We built ourselves a tyrant, and a shattered morgue to house the living)
The perils of the future can so easily be ignored
But there is no escape
When the phantoms lie within.

Your embrace is a taut gallows loop
(Though it speaks of other things:
Of magic-carpet clouds, tormenting a silver savannah sky,
Swallow-tailed standards, wrinkling in the cool alabaster dizziness
Of innocence.)
And now, one last daisy blooms
Twining itself (serpentine) about the frigid machine’s heart
Inside my television
Unfurling sweet and slow as syrup – a comb-fringed head rearing
Colder than Empyrean
Brighter than a sea of vacant celebrity smiles
I’m lost, tangled, disparate…
Shackled to your dreams
And I can’t change
The channel.

Where black, bleeding roses await the Thirteen,
I see not the stars, but the darkness between

© Copyright 2006 Rachel Isaacs - All Rights Reserved
ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
1 posted 2006-07-24 09:27 PM


Welcome Rachel to Passions!
Outstanding write!
TD

The Lady
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634
The Southwest
2 posted 2006-07-24 10:18 PM




Exquisite lines here, Rachel.


"And God – God is a pavement artist
A long-haired student with nothing better to do."


deasomnians
Member
since 2006-06-20
Posts 87
California
3 posted 2006-07-24 10:42 PM


Obviously very well thought out, and it works. Excellent job!

"Nature has implanted in our minds an insatiable longing to seek the truth" - CJCL Convention Theme 2005

seraphin
Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1004
Michigan
4 posted 2006-07-24 10:49 PM


This is wonderful.
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
5 posted 2006-07-25 12:17 PM


loved the ending
iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
6 posted 2006-07-25 01:10 AM


Wow!   Welcome to PIP!  Outstanding write here, superb!  *applauding*
aziza
Member Elite
since 2006-07-09
Posts 2995
Lumpy Oatmeal makes me Crazy!
7 posted 2006-07-25 02:12 AM


This poem captivated me.  Great writing.  Thank you.

aziza

Wilga
Junior Member
since 2006-07-25
Posts 22

8 posted 2006-07-25 07:28 AM


this is really great. I so identified with this one. Great expressions and depth
Beautiful

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
9 posted 2006-07-25 07:31 AM



Can't even pull the plug on this one...
to get rid of the visuals you've displayed
so very well.

Excellent work...

Keep it up!

" It matters not this distance now  " Excerpt, Yesterday's Love
~*~
KRJ

bel1e
Senior Member
since 2006-07-24
Posts 1631

10 posted 2006-07-25 07:32 AM


wow~

this one tunnels deep~

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

11 posted 2006-07-25 09:40 AM


there were just to to many dynamic symbols here specifically created from the distance, that communicated visual elements where darkness melds with the light, great necessity, great power reflecting

this...

Through an ice-edged lens, we exchange…
A single glance
You keenly exhibit the frozen smile
Of a man who has forgotten how to cry
Anything, to paint a new history
Anything to forget.
I’ll cram our dirty memories into a red velvet clutch-bag
And stride indifferently from your side
(Although I seem to have misplaced
My legs…and…
My soul.)


whew, loved this...and the intensity, the focus!!!!!!

excellent!

Bridget Shenachie
Senior Member
since 2002-01-23
Posts 1056
Kansas USA
12 posted 2006-07-25 06:17 PM


Wow!  Such imagery and a fantastic ending.  Loved the write...and I'm looking for more of it.

Shenachie

the quell
Member
since 2006-07-19
Posts 144
Liverpool, UK
13 posted 2006-07-26 06:39 AM


Thank you all SO much for your kind comments, and your words of welcome! *hugs all round*

Where black, bleeding roses await the Thirteen,
I see not the stars, but the darkness between

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #38 » What do Daisies Know of Hell?

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary