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Open Poetry #38
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deasomnians
Member
since 2006-06-20
Posts 87
California

0 posted 2006-07-24 12:30 PM


Petals

Rose petals rain in my backyard
And I lie, dazed,
Gazing forlornly through the foggy glass.
The beginnings of tears
Prick at the frames of
My black-rimmed eyes
And I plead with them,
Begging them, just this once,
Not to fall.

I’ve carved a hole in
The pit of my stomach,
Anticipating the familiar
And welcome
Wave of relief and comfort to fill it.
But instead, my new friend
Loneliness claws his way back in
With a distinct and poignant lack
Of ceremony.

I feel that just because it is cliché
Does not mean you can use
My shattered heart
Against me.
But my words to you are in
Invisible ink,
Or may never have been written at all.
Rose petals rain in my backyard,
And I wait, alone.

"Nature has implanted in our minds an insatiable longing to seek the truth" - CJCL Convention Theme 2005

© Copyright 2006 deasomnians - All Rights Reserved
aziza
Member Elite
since 2006-07-09
Posts 2995
Lumpy Oatmeal makes me Crazy!
1 posted 2006-07-24 02:24 AM


I love this ... a rose petal rain.  It's sad and so beautiful.

aziza

Billy_tha_Kidd
Junior Member
since 2006-07-17
Posts 27
Indiana USA
2 posted 2006-07-24 02:57 AM


beautiful...really!
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
3 posted 2006-07-24 07:28 AM


yes, sadly beautiful

I remember the feeling

iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
4 posted 2006-07-24 05:36 PM


Well done......saving this one.
vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
5 posted 2006-07-24 05:36 PM


good read
deasomnians
Member
since 2006-06-20
Posts 87
California
6 posted 2006-07-24 05:54 PM


Thank you all for your compliments, they certainly make loneliness feel less lonely

"Nature has implanted in our minds an insatiable longing to seek the truth" - CJCL Convention Theme 2005

The Lady
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634
The Southwest
7 posted 2006-07-24 06:36 PM



Oh my! Incredibly sad and beautiful.


"And I plead with them,
Begging them, just this once,
Not to fall."


JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
8 posted 2006-07-25 07:56 PM


Nice writing...hugs...James
Bridget Shenachie
Senior Member
since 2002-01-23
Posts 1056
Kansas USA
9 posted 2006-07-25 08:12 PM


There is so much depth and wisdom to this poem.  I especially like the "invisible ink" that protects you from having your "shattered heart used against" you.  Great and dignified write!
Shenachie

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