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Open Poetry #38
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playing.with.crayons
Member
since 2006-01-02
Posts 362
Neverland

0 posted 2006-06-28 05:33 AM


Tears spilled
like tequila
on a weeping winters night

She laughed
hair tangled in whims and fancies
Love, a shattered
china cup
One that is usually kept
dusty and out of reach

She saw a girl
with blackened eyes
charred fingernails
with a voice like
a scratched record stuck on Loop

She saw a girl
bleeding tears
and screaming a lullaby
Holding a tattered teddy bear
and cooing over its broken bow.

She saw a girl
watching her reflection
with tears in her eyes
And hate in her heart.

Knowing
Oh she knew

Never could she look at that reflection
and see someone else.

Never would she be
anything
other than a
broken
cracked
Reflection.



© Copyright 2006 cheye - All Rights Reserved
LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

1 posted 2006-06-28 07:04 AM


this kept my attention all the way through, it was like watching the beginning of a thriller, and I'm screaming for more...I don't mean to make light of the pain that projects from this...but wanted to express the write in its own entity and how good it was to read...excellent write!
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
2 posted 2006-06-28 07:48 AM


ouch
playing.with.crayons
Member
since 2006-01-02
Posts 362
Neverland
3 posted 2006-06-28 09:09 AM


LeeJ and Passing Shadows - thanks a bunch for replying. Much love, cheye xx
Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA
4 posted 2006-08-12 04:38 PM



This hurt to read, probably because I relate so deeply....this is perhaps one of your finest pieces

Melissa~

Intellectually I know that Canada is no better than any other country. Emotionally I KNOW that Canada is the best country in the world!

playing.with.crayons
Member
since 2006-01-02
Posts 362
Neverland
5 posted 2006-08-13 07:37 AM


Melissa - i was so delighted to see your name again!! I am now going to go read them and I expect to be blown away
love Cheye

shirtless
Member
since 2006-04-29
Posts 359

6 posted 2006-08-26 11:28 AM


There are a number of great images here.

"Tears spilled/ like tequila/ on a weeping winters night" -- tequila usually doesn't get spilled until a fair amount has been consumed.  I see someone so drunk on sorrow that the tears are no longer controlled.  The "winters night" suggests she is crying alone.


The dusty china cup also suggests that the painful feelings are usually kept at the back of a seldom opened cupboard.


"screaming a lullaby" suggests an agony and anger over the absence of someone who will soothe her like a lullaby.

Thanks for posting this poem.

PLEASE VISIT MY WEB SITE http://www.anthonyarmstrong.zoomshare.com  

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
7 posted 2006-08-28 05:00 PM


I can see her...and tears are falling from my eyes in compassion.

~A delicate, yet compelling, piece of writing.

You do far more than just play with your crayons.

Loving Light,
EA

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
8 posted 2006-08-28 05:31 PM


good read
seraphin
Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1004
Michigan
9 posted 2006-08-28 06:38 PM


Excellent. Very clear images, captivating.
playing.with.crayons
Member
since 2006-01-02
Posts 362
Neverland
10 posted 2006-08-31 02:52 AM


Shirtless ~ thanks so much for understanding it so well and taking the time to read and respond.

Linda ~ how are you always so impossibly kind? You must be an angel indeed.

Vandana & Seraphin ~ thanks so much for the replies, I thought I wrote this ages ago so I am so humbled its gotten these responses now.


Much love xxx cheye

farewell the ash-tray girl

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