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Open Poetry #38
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transparent_beauty
New Member
since 2006-06-21
Posts 4
MI, USA

0 posted 2006-06-21 01:36 AM


"Beautiful Emptiness"

beautiful is emptiness
and dreadfully cliché
clenching to the pit of your being
feeble to portray
your complete genuine meaning
and it overtakes you
like the heat of a mid-summer's day
as you are caught blind-sighted
when the sun emits it's ray
to apprehend your failure
to find truth in your dismay
while you decipher what is authentic
and what is just word play
raised up and held in place
to make something become of this harsh reality
making light of what we don't understand
seeing the picture in all actuality
or holding our imperfections in the palm of our hands
society will guide you to a familliar place
where the exact replica of every mirror will haunt you
stamp a fictitious smile on your double face
it's enticing, it's ideal
it's anything but real
leaves you with an unsatisfying hunger for what is true
but beautiful is emptiness
only when emptiness is filled with you.


© Copyright 2006 Brandi - All Rights Reserved
skyshine
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2002-02-07
Posts 3058
Beneath the northern stars
1 posted 2006-06-21 01:41 AM


Welcome to Passions! I enjoyed your first post and will look out for more from you. Please check your email for a special message!

sky

I hope someday you get the chance to live like you were dying....
~Tim McGraw

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
2 posted 2006-06-21 07:37 AM


welcome!
I liked this first post a lot...will be looking for more!

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

3 posted 2006-06-21 07:43 AM


this was delightful...nice to see someone who understands themselves so well, despite what others think...

Welcome to Passions, looking forward to reading more of you...


Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
4 posted 2006-06-21 07:53 AM


Your login name is perfectly fitting for what emanates from your captivating first poem. Welcome on Pip!

Love,
Margherita

Nightshade
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962
just out of reach
5 posted 2006-06-21 10:37 AM




Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
6 posted 2006-06-21 12:29 PM


WELCOME TO PASSIONS!
Your entrance post is exceptional.
I look forward to seeing more of your work.
~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain ~

trUstNooNe
Member
since 2006-05-21
Posts 91

7 posted 2006-06-21 02:48 PM


i like it...your poem is very tru..nice write!*!

Lighthousebob
Member Elite
since 2000-06-14
Posts 4725
California
8 posted 2006-06-21 04:41 PM


W E L C O M E...........   T R A N S P A R E N T   B E A U T Y..........  W E L C O M E..........



I enjoyed your poem of discovery. I loved the ending how "Beautiful Emptiness" is actually Beautiful Fullness. The ending was Great. I look forward to reading more of your poetry in the future.

-Bob


Snowflake From Hell
Senior Member
since 2003-07-10
Posts 777
My own little Icey Oblivion
9 posted 2006-06-21 06:34 PM


i agree with everyone else very good first write

Hollow heroes seperate as they run...Shadows linger in your pain dead and done

Kristabell
Senior Member
since 2003-11-29
Posts 678
Portland, OR
10 posted 2006-06-22 03:13 AM


Nice!
jody5
Senior Member
since 2005-12-21
Posts 876
California, U.S.A.
11 posted 2006-06-22 03:25 AM


splendid write. I'm In agreement with everyone else, Welcome.

Huggs Kimberly

JL
Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128
Texas, USA
12 posted 2006-06-23 05:45 PM


"society will guide you to a familliar place
where the exact replica of every mirror will haunt you
stamp a fictitious smile on your double face
it's enticing, it's ideal
it's anything but real
leaves you with an unsatisfying hunger for what is true"

Sounds like "street-smarts"
Non-the-less... It is so true.
Beautiful poetry.

JL


Kristabell
Senior Member
since 2003-11-29
Posts 678
Portland, OR
13 posted 2006-06-23 06:29 PM


Welcome to Passions!!!! This is a good one!

Looking forward to more,
Kristabell

Patricia
Member Elite
since 2003-04-06
Posts 2160
Missouri
14 posted 2006-06-23 09:32 PM


Welcome!  I so enjoyed reading your first post.

Patricia

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