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Open Poetry #37
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Changing
| Open Poetry #37 |
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Changing |
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1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace 
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Changing underneath all my unworthiness you understood my dream of life at best and all the pain not in my head bled in a heart that dripped quite red a new life starts another gone an ugly duckling soon becomes a swan inside of me is so much more behind the painful smile I wore tears are the skin of oceans wide joy and pain both ride this tide despair is a word silently said when who you are is misread reaching deep to soothe my fear I, the caterpillar inch to flight now near stars hold dreams never to be true this one I touch because of you just some words cut out |
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| © Copyright 2006 Helen Chambers - All Rights Reserved | |||
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
behind the painful smile I wore tears are the skin of oceans wide joy and pain both ride this tide despair is a word silently said when who you are is misread Awww, you do write with the finest touch.. tis beautiful, this~~ |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
A very sweet purge of love and affection. "too bad ignorance isn't painful" |
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RedStoneEB Senior Member
since 2003-06-08
Posts 772uk |
Alot of rhyming going on in this poem i don't really like those sorts of poetry but heres the line i like the caterpillar inch to flight now near |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
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Honeybee Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372Ontario, CANADA |
Helen~ In response to the other response - I personally like the rhyme, it's almost perfect in meter - just a bit of tweeking will fix this. BUT, as usual, you write with such grace, uniqueness and depth so consisely. Excellent images and themes - I relate and especially LOVE: "I, the caterpillar inch to flight now near stars hold dreams never to be true this one I touch because of you" Wow, what a vision...This is a keeper  Melissa~ Intellectually I know that Canada is no better than any other country. Emotionally I KNOW that Canada is the best country in the world! |
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