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Open Poetry #37
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Christopher
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Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration

0 posted 2006-02-16 06:32 PM


it is not a silent pain,
this loss of a son.

I only know, because,
I watched his eyes widen in disbelief
and felt his shout,
God, his shout of grief;

“Tyler died!?!”

what could I do,
standing there in my own silence,
grieving for him,
for the four years he loved a grandchild,
even as I imagined the loss of my own son.

to never see that smile again...

it is too much to bear.
and now,
my pain can no longer be silent.

I too must grieve for Tyler.




© Copyright 2006 C.G. Ward - All Rights Reserved
Rainbowdust
Member
since 2002-12-05
Posts 320
Sydney, Australia
1 posted 2006-02-16 06:35 PM


My heart goes out to you Chris.. *hugs*

The soul would have no rainbows, had the eyes no tears.

Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
2 posted 2006-02-16 06:44 PM


Chris.....The empathy of feeling someone elses pain as if it was your own, really hurts.  You say it so well!  
Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

3 posted 2006-02-16 06:53 PM


Christopher sometimes we feel others pain as it it were our own because we care so much.  Your words are deeply moving.  
Christopher
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Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
4 posted 2006-02-16 06:53 PM


Thank you Martie, Rainbow.

It's horrible.

And I can't seem to get it out of my head. I guess now, as a father, it's too personal.

Christopher
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Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
5 posted 2006-02-16 06:54 PM


Sorry, Donna, you slipped in there on me. You may be right. Thank you for your words.
Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
6 posted 2006-02-16 06:59 PM


Chris....What happened and to who.  I got to worrying...you're not talking about your son dying are you?  I think it must be someone else's son from the sound of the poem.  Someone else with that same name?  Could you please explain?
Christopher
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Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
7 posted 2006-02-16 07:14 PM


Sorry, Martie.

Received a call today from one of my employee's mother. She asked me to stand by him while she told him that his four-year-old grandson Tyler had died. It was possibly one of the emotionally hardest things I have ever done in my life, to hear his grief.

I don't know what happened to Tyler. Last I heard, he had a minor cold. Now this.

I don't think I made the connection until you asked, but Tyler is my son's middle name. Aiden is his first.

So sad. And, what can I do to help, but be there if he needs anything?

Thank you Martie for your concern. I really appreciate it.

Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
8 posted 2006-02-16 07:20 PM


Christopher

I'm so glad it wasn't your Tyler.  I went searching to find your son's name...and then did a little math and saw that he must be only two, not the four of the Tyler in your poem.  A difficult situation, to be there for someone grieving.  I'm sure you were very helpful, as you indicate in the heart with which you felt his emotion.  Take care!

Mysteria
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since 2001-03-07
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British Columbia, Canada
9 posted 2006-02-16 11:35 PM


This is going to hit you square between the heart and gut being a father now Christoper.  I think any parent that loses a child or sees them go before them is possibly the most devastating thing there could be, and the hardest to grieve.

I am so sorry for their loss, and your heartache, it must be terrible for all.

Edward Grim
Senior Member
since 2005-12-18
Posts 1154
Greenville, South Carolina
10 posted 2006-02-16 11:53 PM


God, man, I'm so sorry. I know what it's like to lose a loved one, it's harder than words can describe. You will be in my prayers. And I hope you find peace in this time of pain.   - Ed
The Lady
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634
The Southwest
11 posted 2006-02-17 12:14 PM




Christopher,

"It was possibly one of the emotionally hardest things I have ever done in my life, to hear his grief."

I am glad that your heart was brave enough to be with him while he took this terrible blow. I admire you greatly.

Your poem is profoundly touching.


serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

12 posted 2006-02-17 02:44 AM


The sadness is ... oh C.

It can knock y'off your knees.

tracie66
Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713
Australia
13 posted 2006-02-17 06:17 AM


Christopher~
This is so sad, my heart goes out to you and those concerned.

~hugs~ sweetie
Tracie

Love is the life of the soul...
It is the harmony of the universe
                        — W. E. Channing



PouringJewels
Member
since 2003-09-18
Posts 158
Maryland
14 posted 2006-02-17 06:23 AM


The only comfort I can give, is that he is needed now for a better purpose.
babygirlwlove
Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180
New York City
15 posted 2006-02-17 07:28 AM


**s o u n d s** a loss~

godspeed, Tyler~

~feeling this deeply Christopher~

~babygirL

**Intoxicant to the SouL**

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

16 posted 2006-02-17 08:26 AM


children coming into our lives seem to spark a whole new changing perspective...Christopher, sending prayers for you and yours...


littlewing
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since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
17 posted 2006-02-17 09:53 AM


*nodding with Julia up there*

But there is NOTHING, sadly, to help with the loss of anyone, especially a child, besides the strength of the soul of that child, his family and those around him to support him, as you are.

I can NEVER nor want to imagine this happening to me.

You are a good man - doing the right thing and you don't even have to question it, do you?

See?


BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
18 posted 2006-02-17 12:27 PM


These sort of situations just break my heart.

We do indeed feel others pain and sorrow as if it were our own, because we're human.

Bless you, Christopher~  You are a kind and caring, gentle man~

OwlSA
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa
19 posted 2006-02-17 02:26 PM


What Kate said and tears for you, your employee and his family.  Thank you for being there for him.

- Owl

vandana
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USA
20 posted 2006-02-17 06:50 PM


enjoyed
INclan
Senior Member
since 1999-07-20
Posts 1024
Indiana, USA
21 posted 2006-02-27 10:21 PM


Christopher,
I have been there. I share YOUR pain. Too many times....
INclan

latteaddict213
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Senior Member
since 2006-02-17
Posts 523
Colorado
22 posted 2006-02-27 10:29 PM


very sad. sorry for your loss. nice write though

             xoxo
            Jessica    
              :)
         Character is what
        you do when you think
       that no one is lookin

Midnitesun
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Gaia
23 posted 2006-02-27 11:14 PM


Oh my. Heart hugs to Tyler's family, and to you, Chris. Thank you for allowing us to help carry the heavy burden of grieving the loss of someone so young.
RIP, Tyler, your soul is now forever free.

Sunshine
Administrator
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since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
24 posted 2006-02-27 11:15 PM



I held back from reeling...

and reading...
but today I felt I could...
and should...
and did.

Thank you

for your compassion.


skyshine
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since 2002-02-07
Posts 3058
Beneath the northern stars
25 posted 2006-02-28 01:45 AM


This hits me hard too, in the same way, Christopher. Your compassion shows through in this.

~sky

I hope someday you get the chance to live like you were dying....
~Tim McGraw

iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
26 posted 2006-02-28 02:50 AM


Christopher...this is so heartfelt.  Parenthood does change our hearts.  It is like any child is like our own, and when it hits close to home.....well...
nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
27 posted 2006-02-28 07:01 AM


I have been there....even if in a different way...to have to tell my Mother in another room, that my sister ( her first born) has just died next to me. There is a strength that kicks in until you have  some quiet  time to yourself and it is then that you "feel" and need to grieve.


M

suthern
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Louisiana
28 posted 2006-03-01 09:05 AM


The compassion of this is beautiful... My sympathies to you and Tyler's family!
Juju
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since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429
In your dreams
29 posted 2006-03-01 10:03 AM


Iam sorry.

-Juju

-<>-~-<>-~-<>-  
*    Juju     *
-<>-~-<>-~-<>-

Marge Tindal
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Florida's Foreverly Shores
30 posted 2006-03-01 10:22 AM


Christopher~
I've read this maybe 6 times now ... it touches the tender of this mother's heart~

Well-written, compassionate penning of a difficult emotional moment~

*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~
Email -   noles1@totcon.com

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