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Open Poetry #36
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serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738


0 posted 2005-12-29 10:24 PM


oh but this a bad moon be -
watch me pinch four flames to three
and yes, I know, I know
you see
me scowling in the trinity
with a mirror to my chin
show me who I used to be
back when I was less like me
and oh-you-so approved.

Bitters in my tea design
a dot dot dotted line--a sign--
a signature and I'd resign
but damn how you begrudge the ink.

Tell me what you'd like and I
will pinch another flame's desire
is that really what you want?
Or was that what you had for lunch--
my god, I am, I'm boring you...
so poof another flame, to two.

You and I, as it was once,
and I know it's not enough
you crave the worship for the "one"
and I am weary orb tonight
reflections of your light be dim--
I am not her, and you? Not him.

Poof. (I am my own reproof.)
Tonight you've won your sol-i-tude.
I am your moon--not mercury.

Besides, this time?
You're boring me.

And when you're done?
Turn off the light.

I have already locked up tight.



© Copyright 2005 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
1 posted 2005-12-29 10:29 PM


serenity,
Excellent, you really can write.

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
2 posted 2005-12-29 10:35 PM


Ok there is so much in this, its so thick, I love it, cold as ice and yet inviting.

This:

watch me pinch four flames to three
and yes, I know, I know
you see
me scowling in the trinity
with a mirror to my chin


What a cool comparison, I love that, and I saw your finger do that, you know?  Saw that mirror too . . .

Your fortune, *smile*  you are so smart , Karen, gosh so many comparisons here - the dotted line, bloodink, eh?

And the candles . . . gosh, makes me feel that its your soul, m'Lady . . .

This line is beyond amazing:

I am your moon--not mercury.

Damn you write so well, am sorry you are upset but you write well when you are.



Totally blew me away . . . I'm whipping through the sky, K . . .

Nightshade
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Member Patricius
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962
just out of reach
3 posted 2005-12-29 11:13 PM


DANG !!


Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
4 posted 2005-12-29 11:16 PM


Poof. (I am my own reproof.)
Tonight you've won your sol-i-tude.
I am your moon--not mercury.

Besides, this time?
You're boring me.

~*~

One can be done after this?
No, no, no...nanette...
one can be undone...
but never done.



Brava!


Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
5 posted 2005-12-30 08:41 AM




There is so much to this..to you..never boring...

I am saving this to study.     I felt you cringe!!!  lol....

love you lots lady!

"too bad ignorance isn't painful"
~Unknown~

latearrival
Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499
Florida
6 posted 2005-12-30 01:42 PM


This hurts me for some reason. I can not bear to watch someone deliberately pinch out their own light for some one else's approval.
or even think they have to. I do not think you could do it either so it softens ...martyjo

[This message has been edited by latearrival (12-30-2005 07:14 PM).]

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
7 posted 2005-12-30 01:54 PM


Damn...lady yer so good!
Hugs YOU!!

In the midst of winter,
I found there lives within me..
An invincible summer.

miscellanea
Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060
OH
8 posted 2005-12-30 02:48 PM


Love this, serenity!  What a voice, such articulation, such power, such magnitude!
As I can never think of a good enough response, I'll leave it there, along with,  "I like this a whole lot!"

miscellanea

suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
9 posted 2005-12-30 03:09 PM


I KNEW I was going to like this... with such a title, how could I not? *S* And the rhyme is sublime, the voice so strong... I was ready to applaud by the time I got to the bolded me *S*

So... I think I will. *S*


icebox
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383
in the shadows
10 posted 2005-12-30 03:31 PM


bumble
stumble
toil and grumble,
seize the witch
and make her mumble,
all tears could have been cast in vein
the scrying web's a finer skein,
and then of course
there's vanity,
the pun of logic's grave contempt
archenemy of sanity
that offers shelter's veil of tears
and clouds the vison of all seers.

The Lady
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634
The Southwest
11 posted 2005-12-30 03:51 PM




Wow!

"Bitters in my tea design
a dot dot dotted line--a sign--
a signature and I'd resign
but damn how you begrudge the ink."

1slick_lady
Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace
12 posted 2005-12-30 03:54 PM


your poetry is just incredible
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

13 posted 2005-12-30 04:28 PM


First I get to hug the ladies... (have missed you Lady Helen)

and C? sigh..that wasn't conjuring, that was an editorial.

If I was gonna conjure, I'd conjure up someone a bit more appreciative for my dinner company than what I had last night.

You like red beans & rice?

Candlelight dresses up the meal nicely.

Too bad he prefers a tv tray...poof!

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

14 posted 2005-12-30 04:52 PM


mmm hmmm...

I suppose I did THIS too:
http://www.sciencedaily.com/upi/?feed=TopNews&article=UPI-1-20051230-15114800-bc-tropical-zeta.xml

If I am conjuring up storms, someone had better send me some hormones fast!

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
15 posted 2005-12-30 05:50 PM


hehe, but I do love the way
you serve up a plate-o-spicey-beans

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
16 posted 2005-12-30 08:32 PM


Karen

You're so good when you're good!!, or is that bad?  I'd send you my hormones if I had any...you don't need any more storms!!  I think YOU are a storm.  

JL
Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128
Texas, USA
17 posted 2005-12-30 08:49 PM


I think you could start a revolution with this one!
This is a really great write.


JL

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