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Open Poetry #36
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TreeFiddy
New Member
since 2005-11-13
Posts 8
North Carolina, United States

0 posted 2005-11-13 11:41 PM



The place where she lives
Is drifting from her fingers
Nothing in her hair that won't turn it grey.
Tries to help the world, she wants to do some good
Day after day she waits
For a bird to come to her feeder.

Counting on her starfish
To play her little northstar
But nothings gonna change
When she churns the water again.

She just wonders where.
Doesn't know the dusk, despite
The wind chimes by her bed.
Thinks she's known a city
But the air-filter scattes her thoughts again.

Until she can't even remember
Where she ever wanted to go.
Never making her way
To the silent silhouette on the mountaintop.
She cries as this plane flies on by
And nothing ever changes for this lost little girl
When she churns the water again.

© Copyright 2005 Andrew Paschal - All Rights Reserved
Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
1 posted 2005-11-14 03:45 PM


Hello there, TreeFiddy!

This line I found endearing ~ and poignant.

~ "Counting on her starfish
To play her little northstar" ~

And the following line was especially appealing to me, as just last night, as a gentle breeze blew through my window, I thought how lovely it would be to have a small windchime in my bedroom!

Warm, welcoming hug,
Earth Angel

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
2 posted 2005-11-14 04:51 PM


TreeFiddy

A portrait that feels very real and touched with a compassionate hand.  Much enjoyed!  

Marge Tindal
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Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
3 posted 2005-11-14 07:40 PM


Andrew~

Welcome to PiP ... I believe I shall find you a delight to read~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*No matter what I search for ...
let me know when it is LOVE that I find*~ <))><

Email - noles1@totcon.com

TreeFiddy
New Member
since 2005-11-13
Posts 8
North Carolina, United States
4 posted 2005-11-14 08:21 PM


thank you all very much, your kind comments mean a lot to me.
aujussy wolf
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Senior Member
since 2003-08-09
Posts 1215
Michigan
5 posted 2005-11-14 08:21 PM


Until she can't even remember
Where she ever wanted to go.
Never making her way
To the silent silhouette on the mountaintop.
She cries as this plane flies on by
And nothing ever changes for this lost little girl
When she churns the water again.
  
  
  
    good stuff man , sad , made me feel alone ....keep it up
~wolf

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
6 posted 2005-11-14 08:29 PM


WELCOME TO PASSIONS ANDREW!
I very much enjoyed this write..
Looking for more of your poems will be a treat.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Now - while the leaves still dance on the wind
While the moon and the clouds come spinning
Will you whisper my name again?
Again...and again...

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