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Open Poetry #36
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Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida

0 posted 2005-08-11 03:30 PM



The rhythm and rhyme
tapping of rain on the roof
of my mortality
Never misses a beat
Soaking me

Never fails to remind
how it used to be
With a single shadow
Talking to the wind
                    rewind

How it hurt to be
Without conversation
Knowing this is it
The extent of me

I wonder of you
do you hear the tapping as well?
do you look at me and know
of a synchronized flow
                      intertwining

between the rush
of words and thought
sewn neatly amongst
the folds of what has become us
                      refined

---------------------
Tahara is a ritual cleansing of the body to prepare for burial.
To me, finding happiness first within ones self, then with another, is sort of a cleansing of the mind, body and soul.  
Both are beautiful and show loving dedication. http://www.jewish-funerals.org/brochure.htm



"too bad ignorance isn't painful"
~Unknown~

© Copyright 2005 Susan Caldwell - All Rights Reserved
stevebrklynnyc
Member
since 2004-01-04
Posts 292
GA, Camden
1 posted 2005-08-11 04:26 PM


Honestly a beautifull write.  Enjoyed this, Steve.
Bodger
Senior Member
since 2005-06-12
Posts 1260
Tolerance for a short time
2 posted 2005-08-11 04:45 PM


You are spot on

Bodger

Excellent words as well

Interloper
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369
Deep in the heart
3 posted 2005-08-11 05:02 PM


you rewound my mind
intertwining thoughts abound
you refine thinking

Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write.

Startime55
Member Elite
since 2003-04-05
Posts 2148
Alberta, Canada
4 posted 2005-08-11 05:06 PM


What a wonderfully refreshing way to look at it...I was captivated....I love it...*big hugs*

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
5 posted 2005-08-11 06:37 PM



The poem is as beautiful
as you yourself are.

On my computer your photo
is very dark and I cannot
make out your face very well
so I took the liberty of
lightening it!




Linda

Greeneyes
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
6 posted 2005-08-12 12:08 PM


Susan this is one of the most thought provoking pieces I have read in awhile....

thank you...

In your light I learn how to love
In your beauty how to make poems
You dance inside my chest where
no one sees you and that sight becomes this art

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

7 posted 2005-08-12 01:18 AM


between the rush
of words and thought
sewn neatly amongst
the folds of what has become us
                      refined


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
what an awesome theme you took inspire from...very cool Susan...
you took your writing to another level with this.
I love all that above verse encompasses.
very well done groovy girl.  

I'll bare the brunt of your long buried pain
I don't mind helping you out ...
But I want you to remember my name

Alanis

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

8 posted 2005-08-12 01:22 PM


yanno, sometimes I think, one can become so comfortable with oneself, they no longer search for a mate...?

this was absolutely beautiful, and boy oh boy what a pretty miss...!

Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
9 posted 2005-08-12 02:53 PM


Susan, I guess you noticed on my reply to:
Florida prepares for Toerag that you and I have a hot date?

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
10 posted 2005-08-12 03:15 PM


elegant as always ms. caldwell
your words sparkle with the clarity of self awareness

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
11 posted 2005-08-12 03:19 PM


I wonder of you
do you hear the tapping as well?
do you look at me and know
of a synchronized flow
                     intertwining

~*~

You know, my friend,
that it very well could have been
that alone, among books, I could have
learned as much of the world,
its inhabitants, its customs,
as I do here, through the sharing
of Poets in PiP...

but I doubt it would have been as much fun!

Thank you!

RMW
Senior Member
since 2001-03-21
Posts 1424

12 posted 2005-08-12 05:33 PM


I love the rhythm of this. Nearly musical. Well done, Susan. Bob
iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
13 posted 2005-08-12 06:13 PM


Susan, this was a wonderful write.  Thanks for the information and perspective.   ...jo
littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
14 posted 2005-08-13 07:40 PM


Susan:

titles always grab me and I was going to google this one and you did it for me.  I can more than relate to your write on many levels and I love learning from reading.  So this is an extra treat.  I had no idea that these customs were practiced, being Irish Catholic, and one point in my life, I seriously studied Judiasm, but was yet unaware of the burial rituals.  

Thank you for this.

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
15 posted 2005-08-13 07:59 PM


Susan, I totally enjoyed reading this!! The words
are beautiful as well as the information. I love to
read of the custom of different people (religions).
And, I love this word "Tahara".

To me, finding happiness first within ones
self, then with another, is sort of a cleansing
of the mind, body and soul.
Both are beautiful and show loving dedication.


And this, Susan, is what I think everyone truly
wants....some just don't want to put the time in it
that it takes to achieve. I am so blessed that Gary and I
both think our relationship is worth the extra time
it takes to work on it. I don't really think a lasting
love just happens. I think both in the relationship
have to care and love enough to do what it takes.

Well, I didn't mean to write a book, but your write
brought so many thoughts to my head. Thanks.
Hugs,
  


gemjop
Member Elite
since 2002-11-18
Posts 2587
Pencilveinia, USA
16 posted 2005-08-13 09:15 PM


Oh wow, very interesting! loved re reading your words from a newer perspective after you explained the meaning.

and very much nodding at the concept.

x


Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
17 posted 2005-08-16 04:04 PM


Thank you everyone!!

"too bad ignorance isn't painful"
~Unknown~

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

18 posted 2005-08-16 05:24 PM


It's a goal of mine to die "clean" yanno.

But that's another matter entirely.

I love how you touch on love and honor as an alchemy of spirit, and Jewish tradition is very rich with many rituals that touch on this.

I very much enjoyed the depth of your writing in this, Susan. And speaking of hot dates, smiling, yep, you are on my "some day..." list!

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