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Open Poetry #36
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Mysteria
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0 posted 2005-08-08 08:22 PM



For Juju's Poetry Challenge (she said as short as possible     so here is mine.)
/pip/Forum7/HTML/000656.html

        

Standing in naked truth
Giving all of me to you,
I can’t help but wonder
Are you my love
Giving all of you to me?

© Copyright 2005 Mysteria 1997 - All Rights Reserved
miscellanea
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since 2004-06-24
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OH
1 posted 2005-08-08 08:50 PM


This is hot!  Yes, I think at one time or other most of us question that.  The answer might be kind of scary!  BTW, I like your play on word, alter/altar.

WOW! I didn't read what the challenge was, but I'm guessing you met it very well! So few words with quite a punch!

enjoyed

miscellanea

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2 posted 2005-08-08 09:01 PM


I honestly wanted to be the one to use that angle on vulnerability, but I guess I'll have to reconsider.  

I love the very subtle irony of standing naked and wondering what it is you're looking at, as though vulnerability is a one-way uncertainty.  "I am the naked truth, but are you?  Or is there more?"

I'll be married some day, and will have to comment again, I suppose.  Thanks for this brilliant, succinct answer to the challenge.

Brian

"God becomes as we are that we may be as he is."  ~William Blake

Mysteria
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3 posted 2005-08-08 09:09 PM


LOL, Brian you go right ahead, your version will FAR excel mine m'friend, and I can't wait to read it.

Go for it!

Thanks miscellanea, and yes I asked that question at the altar 3 times, and I think looking back I already knew the answer   as there has never been a number 4!

Enchantress
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since 2001-08-14
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Canada eh.
4 posted 2005-08-08 09:59 PM


You answered this challenge well Sharon!
Excellent..
Hugs~Nancy

Something tugs at me, I've no doubt of that.
Something from the sea, whichever one I'm near.
When I stray too far from beachland, it calls me back

ice
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since 2003-05-17
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Pennsylvania
5 posted 2005-08-09 06:08 AM


Fits the theme perfectly...very nice...

------------ice/ford
    ><>

LeeJ
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since 2003-06-19
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6 posted 2005-08-09 06:39 AM


Loved this and a challenge met very well, sure brought back memories for me...and do remember not only asking the same questions, but praying to God as well, that more then anything, He helped us both make this work...

I wish every marriage would work as beautifully as this picture...hugs to you
good one Sharon

Sunshine
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Listening to every heart
7 posted 2005-08-09 07:07 AM



Another veil, shifted...
excellent write for the challenge!

Earth Angel
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Realms of Light
8 posted 2005-08-09 09:11 AM


That was perfect! Most of us can identify with that kind of vulnerability! Well done, Sharon!


Linda

nakdthoughts
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since 2000-10-29
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Between the Lines
9 posted 2005-08-09 09:38 AM


sad thing is one never knows until it is too late... and then there is the growing apart that sometimes happens almost out of the blue..

Good write

M

Mysteria
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10 posted 2005-08-09 11:32 AM


and then there is the growing apart that sometimes happens almost out of the blue..

Oh boy Maureen, I think that growing apart is really a very obvious thing, but we chose to ignore it until its too late.  Seasoned in time, hurt, hate, and defeat replace love with an accute sense of worthlessness I think myself.  I have always tended to take the 1st hint given to me, and vamoose.

Glad you enjoyed my altered altar.



Greeneyes
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In Your Poetic Mind
11 posted 2005-08-09 11:54 AM


Sharon...exactly...wonderful words to ponder...well done...

In your light I learn how to love
In your beauty how to make poems
You dance inside my chest where
no one sees you and that sight becomes this art

Juju
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since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429
In your dreams
12 posted 2005-09-04 07:35 PM


Wow that was very good.  I like this alot.

-Juju

Juju - 1.) a magic charm or fetish 2.)Magic 3.)A taboo connected woth the use of magic

The dictionary never lies.... I am magical (;

Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
13 posted 2005-09-06 06:37 PM


A very powerful first line, dear poetess
Amazingly short for all that is said,
and said so exquisitely
Love you
Liz

Larry C
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14 posted 2005-09-06 08:56 PM


And of the morrow...the truth is exposed. Why does saran wrap keep coming to mind?

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

Mysteria
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15 posted 2005-09-06 11:56 PM


don't know Larry, maybe a secret fantasy?  LOL

Thanks all.

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