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Open Poetry #36
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LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296


0 posted 2005-07-28 12:38 PM


immersed in suspension
like a bungee cord…swaying
up and down
he didn’t see the transformation
or smell one turd of meaning,
or of the essence
climbing in his soul
but he felt the feeling,
the self imposed…

How could that be enough?

life engages a sometimes fleeting echo
you can smell it at that very moment
of dawn
like a deafening shot gun blast…POW!

“your much different then all the others!”
he snarls like a dog
“so stop acting like a baboon!”
courage abandons all cost
till it starts looking good


© Copyright 2005 Lee J. - All Rights Reserved
yv
Senior Member
since 2003-05-30
Posts 574

1 posted 2005-07-28 12:47 PM


Deep...dangerously so.  I wish I had something more profound to say...but I was just so taken away with the imagery.  Really effective!

Yv-Goddess of Her Domain. Symbol of Truth Passion Pain. Let Her Smile Rain on the Hearts of the Innocent.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
2 posted 2005-07-28 02:22 PM


YES!!  Powerful write Lee!!
Much enjoyed the read.
Hugs~Nancy

Something tugs at me, I've no doubt of that.
Something from the sea, whichever one I'm near.
When I stray too far from beachland, it calls me back

Juju
Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429
In your dreams
3 posted 2005-07-29 05:20 PM


Enjoyed much my friend

Juju - 1.) a magic charm or fetish 2.)Magic 3.)A taboo connected woth the use of magic

The dictionary never lies.... I am magical (;

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
4 posted 2005-07-29 07:56 PM


LeeJ

This feeling seems familiar.  

Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
5 posted 2005-07-29 08:03 PM


Lee,  you do have a fascinating way of
expression and painting the mood.  Well Done!

SmartChick
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081
On A Journey To The Unknown
6 posted 2005-07-29 08:04 PM


Lee J, I don't think mean notice much of anything.
nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
7 posted 2005-07-29 08:04 PM


he didn’t see the transformation
or smell one turd of meaning,

~smiling at your honesty~

M

MGROVES
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802
california
8 posted 2005-07-31 12:24 PM


loved your choice of words on this one

My spirit will rise
above the sea~
There will be no drowning
of my soul or me~

Honeybunch
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-29
Posts 7115
South Africa
9 posted 2005-07-31 02:53 AM


LeeJ - I find myself smiling but one should rather be sad I think.  Still, there will come a time when one ... can smell though we might not be around to witness it.
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