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Kit McCallum
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0 posted 2005-07-08 08:45 AM


Gotcha Good! (The tale of Ron & Mysteria)


(to the tune of the Beverly Hillbillies Theme Song)


Lettttttttt meeeeeeee ... tell ya ‘bout a story of a man named Ron,
The Pip folks blinked, and POOF the man was gone,
He said “To Niagara! I am off to laugh and playyyyyyyyyyyyy" ...
So he loaded up the car, and he drove there all the wayyyyyy.

Miles, that is ...
Traffic jams!
Border stops!

Welllll theeeee first thing you know he called up Nancy Ness,
The two had a plan which they plotted with finesse,
He said, “I will meet you at Niagara-on-the-Lake!”
And they giggled and they schemed, not a single lone mistaaaaake!

Cool, she was ...
Sly and clever!
Bamboozled all!

Soooooooo Nan said “Girls, we are going to a play”
“It’s called Major Barbara – it’s at the Shaw today.”
She said, “We can sit down, give our feet a little reeeeeeeeest,
But our Sharon wouldn’t have it, so she put her to the teeeeest!

Tried, she did ...
CANCEL it!
Not a play!

Nowwwwwww Nanners wouldn’t budge, she insisted that they go,
She said, “I won’t cancel it! We’re going to that show!”
She tried to appease her so she said “There’s shopping therrrrrre!”
“You can shop till you drop once it’s over, yup, I swearrrrrrrr!”

Stores, there were ...
Great boutiques!
Lots to spend!

Welllllll, Sharon’s eyes lit up at the thought of all the stores,
She told Kit to nudge her in the play if she heard snores,
They drove to the lake but were early for the showwwww,
So Nan looked at Kit saying “Take that gal and goooooooooooooo!”

Shopping spree ...
Hang on tight!
Off they went!

Welllllllllll Sharon she went 90, Kit could barely keep the pace,
A shopping spree with Sharon always turned into a race,
So Kit said to Sharon, “I can’t take it any morrrrrrrrrrrre!”
“I’ll go back to the Shaw, while you finish at the storrrrrrrrrre!”

Not much time ...
Don’t be late!
Promise me!

Sooooooooooooo Sharon took off running with a smile a mile wide,
While Kit searched for Nan (thought her feet had nearly died),
She spied Nan conversing with a man who up and rannnnnnnnnnn!
But the look upon Nan’s face, gave away their little plannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!

Ron, it was ...
In disguise!!!
Sheepish grin!

Wellllllll Kit tackled Ron and she got a great big hug,
She screamed “How’d you do that!?” (then she gave dear Nan a slug!)
When Ron said “Where’s Sharon?” poor ole Kit went almost whiiiiiiiite!
“Oh My God!” She’s gone shopping! All alone!” she said with friiiight!

Gone, that is ...
Could be hours!
Maybe days!!!

Nowwwwwww Nan said “She’ll be here, I have faith in our dear friend.”
“She might have gone off shopping but she’ll be here in the end.”
So Ron followed plans and he snuck inside to hiiiiiiiiiide,
While Nan and Kit sat nervously just waiting there outsiiiiiiiide.

Scared, they were ...
Would she show???
Maybe not!!!

Wellllllll, true to her word, Sharon met them at the front,
Her shopping spree was over and she met them with a grunt,
The girls ushered Sharon to the seats where they should beeeeeeeeeeeeeee,
But instead, sat a man, he was in the way you seeeeeeeeee.

Second seat ...
From the aisle ...
In the way!!!

Wellllllll Sharon didn’t like it and she had a point to prove,
She said it rather sweetly, “Won’t you please get up and move?”
The man just ignored her so Kit said, “I’ll take the aiselllllle.”
While the other gals climbed over that cute man and impish smiiiiiiiiiile.”

Peeved, she was ...
Smoldering!
He had nerve!!!

Sooooooooooo Sharon started chatting as they waited for the play,
She rummaged through her pictures and she talked about the day,
The man kept his head down as she chatted over himmmmmmm,
And declined when she asked him if he’d mind to move againnnnnnnnn.

No, he said ...
Can’t do that!
Seasick there!!!

Wellllll Sharon wasn’t happy, but the curtain then came down,
She simmered as it started and she gave the man a frown,
Poor Kit couldn’t take it, she was giggling on the aisllllllle,
She kept nudging Ron, as he winked and gave a smiiiiiiiiile.

Cool, he was ...
One full act!!!
Intermission!

Sooooooo, intermission came, Sharon spoiling for a fight,
Poor Sharon had no clue who was sitting to her right,
She found Kit alone, and she pulled her friend asiiiiiiide,
Saying, “Boy that man is rude! Can you believe it?” She decried!

Move, he will ...
Stubborn man!
He’ll get his!!!

Welllllll, as the gals were talking, Nan arrived with her new friend,
The man looked at Sharon, tried his best to not offend,
He raised up his hand, in a gesture sweet and kiiiiiiind,
Saying “Since we’re here together, introductions, if you miiiind."

Mind, she thought?
He’s got nerve!!!!
What a man!

Soooooooo Sharon took his hand, and she said her name to him,
He nodded and he said, “My name is Ron.” (and gave a grin),
He wouldn’t let her hand retreat … he held it there awhiiiiiiiile …
Till Sharon’s eyes returned to that impish little smiiiiiiiiiile.

Ron, she said????
Could it beeeee????
Taken in!!!!!!

Welllllllllll, Sharon stood there stunned for a second as it dawned,
We swear we saw a lightbulb flash when she knew she’d been conned,
She dreeeew back her hand, and she stretched her arms out wiiiiiiiiiiiide,
And she hugged, and she laughed, and she screamed until she criiiiiiied!

Fooled, she was ...
Not a clue!!!!!
Gotcha Goooooood!!!!!


                      

(pictures and more, courtesy of Sharon and her poem here:   /pip/Forum97/HTML/000041.html

[This message has been edited by Kit McCallum (07-08-2005 10:06 AM).]

© Copyright 2005 Kit McCallum - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
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1 posted 2005-07-08 08:56 AM


ROFLMAO....

He hillbillies with the best of 'em!

This is precious, Kit!

I laughed so hard - I've got tears in my eyes!

Nan
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2 posted 2005-07-08 09:02 AM


...And it surely was fun, m'friends...

...Kit, this might be one of your all-time best!!.. still sniggling here...

Enchantress
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since 2001-08-14
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Canada eh.
3 posted 2005-07-08 09:11 AM


ROTFL!!  Too funny!  Got her good ya did!
Yes..I agree, this is your best yet Kit..
I was singing the entire piece!

Earth Angel
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Realms of Light
4 posted 2005-07-08 09:35 AM


Ms Mousekiteer, youse is one fine funny poet mouse! Your tail scribed quite a tale!

Truth can be stranger than fiction! lol

Happy hugs,
EA

Seymour Tabin
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since 1999-07-07
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Tamarac Fla
5 posted 2005-07-08 10:00 AM


Dear Kit,
Saw Mike yesterday and he told me all about it. Your poem is a gem. I don't collect many but I will this one. A little jealous of all the fun you gals had. LOL Sending 's to all of you.
  

nakdthoughts
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since 2000-10-29
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Between the Lines
6 posted 2005-07-08 10:47 AM


You are so good at this...I agree, think this is one for the Library and book if ever there is another!!!

Loved it, Kit
and it sure looked like you all had great fun.


M

Martie
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7 posted 2005-07-08 11:40 AM


Kit

You wrote the laugh in this and allowed us to enjoy the fun.  Thank you!  

sweetpoetess
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8 posted 2005-07-08 11:49 AM


ROTFLMBO I can't stop laughing at this. This is so cute.

Poetry is beauty in words.
    

Mousteria
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since 2005-07-04
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9 posted 2005-07-08 12:15 PM


OMG, now you know I don't laugh out loud, and the cat just ran in the other room scared to death!  Warn me next time, what if I had a weak bladder.  OMG, you are too good lady - you captured every moment beautifully.  Still laughing here while printing.  Your good, yup, yup!  

I may come back now y'hear.  (Wayne hide!)

Mysteria
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10 posted 2005-07-08 12:21 PM


Oh and people she is as cute, and sweet as she is smart, and doesn't even realize it.  That is the makings of the best of the best!  Come to think of it, they all are the same that way.

You forgot the part where he brought a bribe in hand
That Hawaiian red-necked hillbilly really took a stand
He brought the water to us girls bribing us a bit
Or was it to throw if I fainted or if threw a little fit?

Canadian style ...
All out screamin,
Jumpin, yellin!

Yup, I did!


Um...bad hair day LOL. *wince*
serenity blaze
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11 posted 2005-07-08 05:17 PM


PRICELESS



(and I am soooooooooo snagging pics)

Balladeer
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12 posted 2005-07-08 07:19 PM


When Nan told me the story, my first thought was "Man, I wish I had enough facts to make a poem of that event!" but you know what? Nothing I could have come up with would have equalled this. Brilliant writing, Kit!
Balladeer
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13 posted 2005-07-08 07:42 PM


Kit, fi you don't make this your PIP photo, I'm coming up there to spank you!!!


JamesMichael
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since 1999-11-16
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Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
14 posted 2005-07-09 12:00 PM


Hey, that guy is getting all the kisses, thats not right...James
latearrival
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since 2003-03-21
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Florida
15 posted 2005-07-09 12:01 PM


Kit, thank you for the laughs. WOnderful job.You got it all in. best, martyjo
JesusChristPose
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since 2005-06-21
Posts 777
Pittsburgh, Pa
16 posted 2005-07-09 12:06 PM


I am singing this song again! Love it!
Elizabeth Santos
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since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
17 posted 2005-07-09 01:40 AM


Aw, how very special this song of sweet friendship. Thank you, precious Kit for the laughs and thank ou pip poet travellers for just being you
I love you all. Wish I could have been there
Big hugs
Liz

kaile
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singapore
18 posted 2005-07-09 08:14 AM


this was so fun to read and partake
Greeneyes
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19 posted 2005-07-09 08:32 AM


sounds like a great time was had by all....this was a joy to read Kit....

I keep a fragrance bottle my
muse gave me when I met him
in endless winter and he
settled me into remembering
who I am.

Balladeer
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20 posted 2005-07-09 04:32 PM


Forget it, Liz. We don't get invited anymore. They used us and just tossed us aside like so much poetic flotsam. I TOLD Sy to stay awake!!!
Ceinwyn
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VA
21 posted 2005-07-09 05:26 PM



If at first you don't succeed destroy all the evidence that you tried.

Kit McCallum
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22 posted 2005-07-10 09:00 AM


Thanks for sharing in the surprise everyone, lol!

My only regret was that Ron, Nan and I didn't have a camera at the exact moment Sharon realized she'd been conned ... soooooo ...

This little rendition will have to do, rofl.



Mysteria
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23 posted 2005-07-10 12:34 PM


Ohhhh, feeling playful today are we?  Okay you asked for it!
iliana
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24 posted 2005-07-10 01:25 PM


What a riot!!!!  Loved it, Kit!  ......jo
Nan
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25 posted 2005-07-10 10:15 PM


That was IT - You DID it, Kit...
hoot_owl_rn
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Glen Hope, PA USA
26 posted 2005-07-10 10:40 PM


Hey Balladeer and Liz, don't feel bad, I didn't get invited either. I think they were worried we'd have to repeat that run for the finish on the scavanger hunt again
Kit...this is priceless
Ruth

toddtvl
New Member
since 2005-07-11
Posts 1
Vancouver, BC
27 posted 2005-07-11 12:44 PM


Yeah,

Finally on here, and using my new iMac (loving it!)

What a great story, I still haven't talked to my Mom about her trip, I think everyone on this board knows more about her great times than I do.  wink! wink!

Todd.

LeeJ
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since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

28 posted 2005-07-11 07:08 AM


LOL
Kitt, this was priceless, enjoyed reading this soooooo much....happy times give memories as such...amazing write, and loved the comments...also loved the pic of Sharon impossed with shock...wish I could have seen her face....you guys are great PIPsters, people, poets and yes, wonderful kids with great spirits....

Hugs to you for sharing

Kit McCallum
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29 posted 2005-07-11 07:12 AM


Thanks again everyone, I’m glad you enjoyed this little tale! I have a feeling Sharon’s already gearing up to organize a new get together so we can invite more Pipsters out to play!

Todd, it’s great to see you posting! Your mom is a treasure - we’ve got lots of memories to cherish from this trip. She had me laughing (or running) most of the visit!  Hmmmm, she hasn’t told you about her, Nan and I at the Casino then?  That might need to be a whole other poem, lol.  

With much appreciation to all,  
/Kit

Nan
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30 posted 2005-07-11 08:15 AM


Hey Todd.. It's GREAT to see you, and Kit's right. Ask her about the Casino...
suthern
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31 posted 2005-07-11 09:34 AM


This is so fantastic I won't even mind humming that song the rest of the day! LOL

Loved it!!!

Sunshine
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32 posted 2005-07-11 07:22 PM


Hello TODD!

We know a lot about your Mom, you, your lovely wife, your beautiful children...

NOW LET'S SEE YOU WRITE!!!

Mysteria
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33 posted 2005-07-11 08:22 PM


Sheesh don't encourage him!  He actually can write but thank goodness he doesn't have time.  I just sent this link to him at work, not realizing he would get in the door!   
Poet deVine
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34 posted 2005-07-12 07:00 AM


Now that Todd is here, Sharon you'll have to behave....LOL...like that's going to happen!

I loved hearing about this trip..can't wait for MORE!

HopeS
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since 2000-12-22
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Perth Western Australia
35 posted 2005-07-12 08:00 AM


Kitt this was fabulous and great fun to read , Hi there Todd , you mum is great but you already know that

Hope

Lacey May
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since 2005-11-07
Posts 1

36 posted 2005-11-07 06:43 PM


Hey Sharon, what happened to Todd ... did he do a read and disappear on us, lol? We must have scared him.

Thanks again for the wonderful comments everyone. Miss ya Nan, Ron and Sharon!

With much appreciation to all,
/Kit

EDIT - OOPS, I'm sorry everyone, lol.  I didn't mean to pop myself to the top!!!! I wanted to test something and need to reply to one of my poems forgetting as a new registrant that it pops me up, rofl! I should have done it in an archive post, lol. Sorry about that! OK, Lacey May (name of my dog by the way) slinks away apologizing profusely with only one post to her name!)  

Enchantress
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Canada eh.
37 posted 2005-11-07 07:03 PM


OMG Kit!!!


Larry C
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38 posted 2005-11-07 07:04 PM


Well, talent gone country! Hillbillie style. I need more time and money so I can play.

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

Mysteria
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39 posted 2005-11-07 08:34 PM


Good grief, you and the dawg are really bored aren't ya?  Yes, Todd disappeared - busy, busy, busy.   You nutcase you!  

I miss you guys too, but looking forward to this year's hot air balloon ride excursion and can't wait!

garysgirl
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40 posted 2005-11-10 05:35 AM


I LOVED this Kit!!! Ya'll are so cute!!
Goodness, I wish I could meet you all!! That would be so fun!!

thanks for sharing all the fun, Kit!!
Huggers,
Ethel

Mysteria
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41 posted 2009-03-28 06:41 PM


Man that was truly funny wasn't it Kit?  I still laugh every time I think about him being so darn abstinent fusing to move.  How he kept a straight face I will never know.
Alison
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42 posted 2009-03-28 07:39 PM


This is one of the funniest things I have sun -- eerrrr, read.  I had read the story on other threads, but this is hysterical.  And damn, Sharon - your shopping abilites have become legendary!

Thank you for bringing this one back -

I am still laughing!

Alison

Mysteria
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43 posted 2009-03-28 08:16 PM


Alison, you had to have been there!  I asked nicely twice for him to move, and after that intermission I was about to make his life miserable by talking through the second half.  If you knew me, you would know I could do that non-stop, and "wirelessly" shop at ebay at the same time.   Ron was dressed like a tourist, baseball cap, shorts, blue and white Hawaiian shirt that I think it was to be his disguise.  I will tell you though our real Ron looks nada thing like his picture on here, he has a "twinkle" that warms your heart.
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