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Open Poetry #35
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Ratleader
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0 posted 2005-06-03 06:58 PM


The Tuner

– excuse me, I’m here to tune –
– not with the bride or groom, I’m here to –
– Ralph? I’m sorry maam, don’t even know anyone named –
– I don’t know, just here to tune the piano and I –
– no, they didn’t tell me there was a wedding, they just –
– oh hello, yes please, could you show me where the –
– a photographer? oh the briefcase... no, I’m not, but –
– no, really, I’m not him – could I –
– please, yes, there’s only an organ in here, could you –
– sorry, no, I must look like him but I –
– Akron? no, maam, Ralph lives there I guess. I live down –
– uh, thanks but I’m working, and I can’t, I’m in A.A. –
– piano, could you show me where the piano –
– right here in town, and my name’s Jim not Ralph –
– I’d like that, sure, but it’s too crowded to dance anyway –
– still married? no, but if you’re talking about Ralph –
– yes I’m sure, down on El Cajon, it’s a halfway house but –
– the dress, oh, you’re a bridesmaid, yes very flattering –
– the piano, could you show me where the –
– picture? they won’t want me in a picture, I’m not –
– no, maam, it’s not that I don’t want to dance, but –
– your car? he sells used cars? you think I look like a –
– I don’t think you’re – I like you but the dance is for –
– as long as you’ve got hold of me, who is this Ralph –
– sorry, I’m sure the wine is good, but I –
– yes that music is too loud for me too –
– a piano with the band? but maybe they’ll know –
– oh there you are again! maam, the piano, could you –
– go somewhere quieter? I’d like that, but I’m here to –
– but I’m not Ralph, I just came here to –
– I don’t know, do you think the piano’s in there? I –
– what we did last summer? you mean you and –
– you’re going to lock the door? lights? are you –
– sure you want to do this? oh my –
– on the piano? oh hell, why not! –



~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

© Copyright 2005 Ed Ratledge - All Rights Reserved
Martie
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1 posted 2005-06-03 07:48 PM


Ed....you crack me up!!  Where on earth did this come from?....oh, never mind.  It was wonderful!  
Aleta
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since 2005-04-17
Posts 102
Louisiana
2 posted 2005-06-03 08:41 PM


As if inside the mind and the laughter never stopped, but OH!  I will never look at my piano the same again!  Thanks for the smiles.
suthern
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3 posted 2005-06-06 05:02 PM


This is fantastic, my friend! *S* It's also sad commentary that we really don't listen to anything that doesn't conform to our assumptions. *S*

Or maybe not so sad... Jim seemed to enjoy his surrender to circumstances??? LOL

Excellent work!

Ratleader
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4 posted 2005-06-06 05:19 PM


Remembering.....I tested that once....in the middle of a dinner party, in conversation with one of my many Dutch Aunts-In-Law, I said "My Aunt Irma died of a goiter last week...." and the conversation went on as if I'd said I'd painted the pantry....

I said it loudly enough for everyone at the table to hear, but only my friend Erl did -- knew exactly what I was up to, and just barely managed not to snort his wine cooler......

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
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passing shadows
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displaced
5 posted 2005-06-06 05:40 PM


LOL

much enjoyed

CastleGuard
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Alberta, Canada
6 posted 2005-06-06 07:02 PM



LOL....that was hilarious...

I take it...umm...Jim...did find the piano...LOL!!

Methinks it shall need a lot more tuning....LOL

CG

Ratleader
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7 posted 2005-06-06 07:08 PM


It was making beautiful music, last I heard.....

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
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CastleGuard
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Alberta, Canada
8 posted 2005-06-06 07:14 PM



...then The Tuner...did his job well...

CG

Ratleader
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9 posted 2005-06-06 07:18 PM


He always tries to put something of himself into each job......

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Enchantress
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Canada eh.
10 posted 2005-06-06 07:22 PM


Fantasitc writing here Ed...I love it!
And, I say...

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain~

passing shadows
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displaced
11 posted 2005-06-08 08:32 AM


needed a giggle this morning...

Pilgrimage
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Texas, USA
12 posted 2005-06-08 10:10 AM


See? Told ya.  It stands on its own like a flag on a pole for all the Uncle Ralph's in the world to salute.  

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

Sunshine
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13 posted 2005-06-08 10:17 AM


Giggling at this...

I've been in the middle and UNDER
conversations just like this...



excellent job here...surely written
for the smiles you're getting!

LeeJ
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since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

14 posted 2005-06-08 10:22 AM


ahhhh, yes, assumptions, as our personal mind connects with conditioning...it is as we think and believe....

your pinching me awake...YOU CAD!...hehe

after retracting the purpose behind this, could not help but think of that scene in "Pretty Woman"  and then..... lest we say no more...hehe

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