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Passions in Poetry

As The Butterfly Climbs

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Ratleader
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Member Rara Avis
since 01-23-2003
Posts 7179
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass


0 posted 05-04-2005 05:18 PM       View Profile for Ratleader   Email Ratleader   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Ratleader's Home Page   View IP for Ratleader

As The Butterfly Climbs
  
The air was alive then and I was in it
all the bobbling lift and fling
and oh the rise of it,
pulsing under my outspread wings!
I could take a tree on an updraft
or hover like thought
over a dandelion to sip.
  
Now theyíre spent, rag-edged,
and the powder so lost
the sun shines through
when I flare them to the breeze;
but I can feel it still, remember,
climbing this stalk as I must do.
I remember too the vibrant flash of you,
your almost sparkle over the leaves.
  
I climb slow now past thistle spines,
specks of pollen clinging to my legs,
remembering our days, how the sun
would warm us in the morning
and the moonís cool flow in darkness
when the moths would come to share
while we were sleeping.
Iím nearly high enough now
and where are you, I wonder?
  
I hope your wings
still have their color sheen
to lift you in that almost magic
that mine lost bit by bit in chances,
touches and collisions and
one frantic flight from a bird.
I wish I could pull past
the coarse spikes of the thistle bud,
taste the warm smooth nectar again,
but this will do, itís high enough.
  
I feel the breeze;
in a moment Iíll fling myself out,
and if it catches me turning
spreading, flailing for time,
I may still feel the joy of it
for just a moment, as I fall.

© Copyright 2005 Ed Ratledge - All Rights Reserved
Martie
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Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


1 posted 05-04-2005 05:22 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Ed

I have often wished for wings, but never really considered the possibility of falling if I had them.  I loved the metaphor you used in this, the strength to try through fear.  
BluesSerenade
Member Rara Avis
since 10-23-2001
Posts 9867
By the Seaside


2 posted 05-04-2005 05:23 PM       View Profile for BluesSerenade   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for BluesSerenade

climb slow now past thistle spines,
specks of pollen clinging to my legs,
remembering our days, how the sun
would warm us in the morning
and the moonís cool flow in darkness
when the moths would come to share
while we were sleeping.
Iím nearly high enough now
and where are you, I wonder?

I wonder too, and will be pondering this for some time.
*Just beautful*
I have always loved the way you write, Ed~
Greeneyes
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Member Patricius
since 09-09-2000
Posts 10848
In Your Poetic Mind


3 posted 05-04-2005 06:57 PM       View Profile for Greeneyes   Email Greeneyes   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Greeneyes

I hope your wings
still have their color sheen
to lift you in that almost magic
that mine lost bit by bit in chances,
touches and collisions and
one frantic flight from a bird.
I wish I could pull past
the coarse spikes of the thistle bud,
taste the warm smooth nectar again,
but this will do, itís high enough.
  
I feel the breeze;
in a moment Iíll fling myself out,
and if it catches me turning
spreading, flailing for time,
I may still feel the joy of it
for just a moment, as I fall.''


____


these lines blow me away,  there is so much emotion woven all through this....you're soaring and it shows!




Lauren~

I donít mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile

Beki
Senior Member
since 09-15-99
Posts 1615
Newport Beach, CA, USA


4 posted 05-05-2005 12:27 AM       View Profile for Beki   Email Beki   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Beki

wow! Ed you have outdone yourself -- this absolutely ROCKS!!!!!!!!!! I love the metaphor, I love the message...I love the presentation...it is one awesome poem, dude!
latearrival
Member Elite
since 03-21-2003
Posts 4407
Florida


5 posted 05-05-2005 01:24 AM       View Profile for latearrival   Email latearrival   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for latearrival

Excellent! Bravo, marty
Goldenrose
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since 05-30-2003
Posts 3637


6 posted 05-05-2005 04:13 AM       View Profile for Goldenrose   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Goldenrose

An unusual subject...putting yourself in the butterflies place...and usuing metaphor...but using words not expected...enjoyed this read ED..thank you..

Goldenrose.

Justice cannot be for oneside alone, but must be for both. (Eleanor Roosevelt)

passing shadows
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since 08-26-99
Posts 46297
displaced


7 posted 05-05-2005 04:31 AM       View Profile for passing shadows   Email passing shadows   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for passing shadows

wow
LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 06-19-2003
Posts 13093
SE PA


8 posted 05-05-2005 06:46 AM       View Profile for LeeJ   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for LeeJ

there was someone once, a long time ago, it was one of the happiest moments of my life, then...but, we both failed each other, and...hard as it may seem, we could never go back, but the wonderful thing about life is, if both are willing a friendship may flourish from the relationship...and two may learn a great deal from each other that way...your poem reminds me of the progress two people could make, if there are no expectations from each other, other then to share thoughts...and maybe  in the end, the two might realize, that even though once, they shared a great love, they grew apart seperately, into different worlds...which was best for them....for from that great love, they learned the brutal pain of they're own mistakes which caused the other great heartache?

I dunno, but, see what your poem did?  Many thoughts to ponder, hugs hun...and thank you for a wonderful thought provoking, heartfelt write.
Sunshine
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Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


9 posted 05-05-2005 07:32 AM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine


Even though the butterfly may fall...
it took grit and strength to climb
the prickly stem for one last attempt.

The responses here are provoked[?] by
the seriousness...and hope...of this
wonderful work.

Consider flying high, leave the bad behind
and look for the good...for even though
evil exists...the beauty of the artful
butterfly consists of dreams on wing.

Bravo!
suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


10 posted 05-05-2005 09:17 AM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

This one climbed straight into my heart... I think it's one of your best!!! You paint so vividly with your words... leaving the reader feeling the yearn as intensely as they see the ragged wings struggling towards height... to feel flight again for one more moment... even if it means being willing to fall...

I could chatter forever and not do this justice... it's absolutely superb!
miscellanea
Member Elite
since 06-24-2004
Posts 3983
OH


11 posted 05-05-2005 12:15 PM       View Profile for miscellanea   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for miscellanea

The air was alive then and I was in it
all the bobbling lift and fling
and oh the rise of it,
pulsing under my outspread wings!
I could take a tree on an updraft
or hover like thought
over a dandelion to sip.

Such a wonderful feeling!  You describe it perfectly!   As always, I enjoy reading your poetry!

Wishing you a great week!  Whoops--as we're almost to the weekend, perhaps I should say, "have a great weekend!"

                  miscellanea
Gentle Spirit
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since 10-09-2000
Posts 14329


12 posted 05-07-2005 09:10 AM       View Profile for Gentle Spirit   Email Gentle Spirit   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Gentle Spirit

This one touches deeply Ed.  Each verse holds so much depth.  Well done sir.
Copperbell
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since 11-08-2003
Posts 952


13 posted 05-07-2005 12:34 PM       View Profile for Copperbell   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Copperbell

This is beautiful - as others have said - this so connects with our experiences

including my own
Startime55
Member Elite
since 04-05-2003
Posts 2182
Alberta, Canada


14 posted 05-07-2005 12:56 PM       View Profile for Startime55   Email Startime55   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Startime55

Your words bring to life colors and feelings filled with magic and wonder...A stunning poem that ripple in the mind long after it is read....BRAVO!!!...
MGROVES
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Member Elite
since 02-01-2004
Posts 3801
california


15 posted 05-20-2012 07:20 PM       View Profile for MGROVES   Email MGROVES   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for MGROVES

like spirits, little angels of gods

My spirit will rise
above the sea~
There will be no drowning
of my soul or me~

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