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Open Poetry #35
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ThUnDeRkYsS
Senior Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 727
Wisconsin

0 posted 2005-04-26 10:58 AM


"I love you, you're my best friend"
"sometimes I think you're the only one who cares about me"
you show up at my house, middle of the night
"he did it again"
"can I come in?"
you're bruised, cut, bleeding
crying
"I hate him"
"why do I deserve this?"
battered, hurt and
drinking
you're here.
Again.
"He's cheating, I hate him"
"he did it again"
How many times?
when will you learn?
what makes it worth it?
You're here, again,
saying you love me.
Making me feel this.
Why do YOU do it?
How many times will you fall into my arms?
Making me hurt for you?
Again.
But just for a little while
Again.
How many times will you leave in the morning
hug me
hold me
"I have to change, I dont deserve this"
then drive back...
to...
Him.
He did it again
You did it again.
I did it again.
I let you in.

Strive for higher levels, if they seem out of reach... Grow, and they will get closer.


[This message has been edited by ThUnDeRkYsS (04-26-2005 12:27 PM).]

© Copyright 2005 B.J.Howe - All Rights Reserved
Marge Tindal
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Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
1 posted 2005-04-26 12:16 PM


Brian~
Understanding the pain behind this one ...~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost,
the spirit rejoices over what it has left.
- Sufi epigram <))><

Email noles1@totcon.com

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
2 posted 2005-04-26 12:18 PM


Such a sad write..it's good that you are there for her.
heart hugs.

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain ~

SEA
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Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
3 posted 2005-04-26 05:50 PM


sometimes loving someone means you have to let them fall down, and pick themselves back up...you can't always do it for them even though that is all you want to do. I'm sorry your heart is getting hurt in the mix of it all...and if this is "just a write" you did damn good cause this made my heart hurt for YOU.
ThUnDeRkYsS
Senior Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 727
Wisconsin
4 posted 2005-04-26 07:09 PM


Marge ~ Thank you for understanding and the HugZ...

Enchantress ~ I still believe that a little bit, thank you for the HugZ as well... right back atcha {{HugZ}}

SEA ~ I know, loving somebody can SUCK at times   No, this is not "just a write"... I wish it were at times.  So hard to see somebody do that to themselves, especially when you care for them so much.  It's just been on my mind a lot lately and this write pretty much sums it up.  Thanks for the girl. Much love.

Strive for higher levels, if they seem out of reach... Grow, and they will get closer.



passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
5 posted 2005-04-26 07:43 PM


oh

I'm sorry for your sadness and pain.
I hope things get better.

Nightshade
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Member Patricius
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962
just out of reach
6 posted 2005-04-26 07:46 PM


You have a kind and gentle heart. This is an emotional write. Much enjoyed. Chris

Poetry is an echo, asking a shadow to dance.
~Carl Sandburg

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
7 posted 2005-04-26 07:47 PM


good read
ThUnDeRkYsS
Senior Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 727
Wisconsin
8 posted 2005-04-26 11:13 PM


passing shadows ~ Thank you, I try not to think about it... just felt like "getting it out" sort of because it was on my mind a bit too much today.  I hope it gets better too.

Nightshade ~ As do you, thank you.

vandana ~ Thank you.

Strive for higher levels, if they seem out of reach... Grow, and they will get closer.



passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
9 posted 2005-04-27 06:29 AM


Brian, you need someone who will be in love with you...

please seek love in someone other than this one

ThUnDeRkYsS
Senior Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 727
Wisconsin
10 posted 2005-04-27 09:23 AM


passing ~ I do not seek love with her, she has been a very close friend for 3 years and I care about her.  Just tears me up when I see her do this to herself for no reason, one would think somebody would figure out that its not going to change, but shes banking that it will, she's been in the hospital 3 times because of him and I know I cant help her, just be there for her.  Just hard to watch and even harder to see the point.  Do I stop being friends with her because she hurts herself?  I guess when it becomes unhealthy for me, I'll have to... but I'm not looking forwards to making that decision because she really has nobody else.

Brian

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
11 posted 2005-04-27 12:21 PM


Brian, I was in the same situation as her once. I stayed because of financial reasons mostly, but as soon as I got the tax refund check and got a car, I left. It was hard to start over, but at least I'm still alive and can sleep good at night.

He went to jail twice for domestic violence and stalking after I left. It was hard to do it and I even thought about going back, but I had friends around me that supported and comforted me.

Stick it out with her. But sometimes when you choose to do that, you have to put a wall up so it doesn't hurt you so bad to be there. Nothing in the world will help her if she doesn't want to help herself.


Copperbell
Senior Member
since 2003-11-08
Posts 956

12 posted 2005-04-27 09:28 PM


so sad - I wish you strength and wisdom - she's lucky to have someone who cares for her - perhaps you will help to strengthen her so that she can leave

God bless

Midnitesun
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Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
13 posted 2005-04-27 10:07 PM


*sigh* such a heartfelt write.
And he will do it again, and so will she
(you, too), if someone does not stop the cycle, say no more will we travel down that road.
It's time to stop being the enabler, and encourage them to seek professional help if you really do care...as I believe you do from this outpouring.

yv
Senior Member
since 2003-05-30
Posts 574

14 posted 2005-04-27 11:00 PM


...Speechless.  I got chills as I read this poem.  A lump formulated in my throat as I read eac word.  Lovely.

Yv-Goddess of Her Domain. Symbol of Truth Passion Pain. Let Her Smile Rain on the Hearts of the Innocent.

ThUnDeRkYsS
Senior Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 727
Wisconsin
15 posted 2005-04-27 11:16 PM


Copperbell ~ Thank you, I try as best I can to help strengthen her but I cannot make the choice for her... All I can do is be there for her and hope she changes before I have to.  Thanks again.

Midnitesun ~ I know, they have been to counciling, she stays in but after a while he refused to go, thinks its all nonsense and "everythings fine".  I stopped offering my opinions to her a while back, I just lend a shoulder and some support, it's hard sometimes.  Thank you for taking the time to read and comment.

yv ~ Thank you, I am touched with your reply.

Strive for higher levels, if they seem out of reach... Grow, and they will get closer.



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