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Open Poetry #35
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wranx
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since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn

0 posted 2005-04-09 12:02 PM



There’s no pardon in the River
On nights like this

On the nights that follow rains

When his face becomes bloated
Angry and red

Even the birds keep their distance
Daring not to perch too near

And damned little metaphor

As long as one doesn’t notice the discarded things
And the misplaced things he gathers into himself

Or the dead things
The trees, felled for living too close, too long

Then hurried off, feet first
Their hands folded neatly on their chests

On days like this
The River doesn’t listen

Filled, as he is, with his own importance
And impatient to be wherever it is, he's going

But, I’ll talk to him anyway

Speaking in quiet ephemera, and gesturing
Pointing to the places I’ve come unraveled

And soon realize, my flailing goes unnoticed
And my words, light as they are, settle

Are swept up into his rushing core
And drown


© Copyright 2005 E.F.Rose - All Rights Reserved
Midnitesun
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Posts 28647
Gaia
1 posted 2005-04-09 12:04 PM


*Speaking in quiet ephemera, and gesturing
Pointing to the places I’ve come unraveled

And soon notice, my flailing goes unnoticed*

oh really? LOL, not YOUR words, mon ami

I love the way you put the river of life into words


and you always get my attention

Martie
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since 1999-09-21
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California
2 posted 2005-04-09 12:05 PM


Ed

Perhaps, by the time it gets to the sea, your voice explodes....and the meaning of your words has been given to both the river and the sea.  Oh, I liked this poem...I did!

Mysteria
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since 2001-03-07
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British Columbia, Canada
3 posted 2005-04-09 01:33 AM


Maybe the thoughts drown, but then again maybe that's a good thing?  I see it is river time again, may I have the link again Ed to watch the levels?     Great poem Yeti.
Goldenrose
Member Elite
since 2003-05-30
Posts 3665

4 posted 2005-04-09 04:40 AM


Great poem Ed..thanks..

Goldenrose.

Love comforteth like sunshine after rain. (William Shakespeare.)

Seymour Tabin
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since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
5 posted 2005-04-09 08:04 AM


wranx
All I see and hear is "that old man river he just keeps rolling along." Enjoyed

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

6 posted 2005-04-09 08:42 AM


"Speaking in quiet ephemera, and gesturing
Pointing to the places I’ve come unraveled"

damned little metaphor indeed

I love you Ed.

Enchantress
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since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
7 posted 2005-04-09 05:02 PM


Yes!!  Very much enjoyed!

For it was not into my ear you whispered
But into my heart
It was not my lips you kissed
But my soul

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
8 posted 2005-04-09 05:08 PM


outstanding write!

I love an impatient, self-centered river, and the visualization of words being swept into the middle and drowning is awesome here

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
9 posted 2005-04-09 05:20 PM



Yes, in many areas,
rivers are rushing
the deadwood...

wonderful write, Wranx.
Have been missing you -
glad to see you home again.

Huan Yi
Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688
Waukegan
10 posted 2005-04-09 05:26 PM


In the end there's
a touch of John Haines
in this.  Good.


JamesMichael
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since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
11 posted 2005-04-09 06:38 PM


Enjoyed...James
icebox
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since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383
in the shadows
12 posted 2005-04-10 12:40 PM


Yes, rivers are like that, aren't they Brother?

*smile*

Honeybunch
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since 2001-12-29
Posts 7115
South Africa
13 posted 2005-04-10 01:11 PM


A thought provoking write!  Enjoyed!
passing shadows
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since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
14 posted 2005-04-11 02:34 PM



Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
15 posted 2005-04-11 05:39 PM


Definitely a dark and stormy night, Wranx! Sometimes it's hard to understand why things happen the way they do; maybe it IS because he's angry.

Peace,

Corinne

vandana
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USA
16 posted 2005-04-11 07:27 PM


good write
suthern
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Louisiana
17 posted 2005-04-12 08:29 AM


On days like this
The River doesn’t listen

Filled, as he is, with his own importance
And impatient to be wherever it is, he's going

But, I’ll talk to him anyway

Speaking in quiet ephemera, and gesturing
Pointing to the places I’ve come unraveled

And soon realize, my flailing goes unnoticed
And my words, light as they are, settle

Are swept up into his rushing core
And drown

~applause~

or perhaps an awed silence would be more fitting... this is superb!!!

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
18 posted 2005-04-13 03:17 PM


"felled for living too close, too long"

hmm..that touches.

Enjoyed very much.

"too bad ignorance isn't painful"
~Unknown~

scorpio
Member Ascendant
since 2002-10-02
Posts 5178
right...there
19 posted 2005-04-13 04:08 PM


As a watcher of water, I was immersed in this fluid write.

believe in what your heart feels...

MGROVES
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since 2004-02-01
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california
20 posted 2005-04-18 04:23 AM


enjoyed this~

My spirit will rise
above the sea~
There will be no drowning
of my soul or me~

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

21 posted 2005-04-18 12:53 PM


fantastic writing Ed,
much enjoyed.  ~

Aleta
Member
since 2005-04-17
Posts 102
Louisiana
22 posted 2005-04-18 01:37 PM


Swept up in the currents of your words, the source and strength running through my veins as the river channel carried this reader along..   Beautiful write, indeed!
Earth Angel
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since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
23 posted 2005-04-18 02:18 PM


The surging of your words coursed through my body as I was pulled along by the raging current of your illustrious and impassioned ink.

Big welcome back hug,

Linda
Flowers

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350
the ass-end of space
24 posted 2005-04-18 09:15 PM


always a pleasure to read your words wranx
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